Every 2022 Grammys performance, ranked from worst to best

Look, there’s only one major reason to tune into the Grammys broadcast, and it definitely isn’t so you can look deep inside the souls of Academy voters in order to try and fathom . It’s to see live performances from tremendous artists, who this year ran the gamut from Billie Eilish to Carrie Underwood. The A.V. Club decided to break down this year’s music offerings, and determine which were the best, via deeply scientific processes involving A) watching them, and B) saying, “hey, that was pretty good/pretty bad.” Here, then are the results of that rigorous evaluation, beginning with the worst and moving, ineluctably, to the finest in all the land—or at least the finest in the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas tonight.Note to desktop users: If you’d like to read this in a scrolling format (and why wouldn’t you?), simply narrow your browser window.

There were a lot of wonderful, talented, but slightly less well-known artists who performed on the rooftop of the building during the Grammys this year (many of them pre-taped, no less). Ostensibly, it was a way to showcase some talented artists, but since we never got more than 30 seconds of any of those performances, it was pretty hard to know if any of them were any good. Some of them were promising, though—Aymée Nuviola, Billie Strings, and more—so if you actually want to see the full thing, you can find them at CBS.com. (And some weren’t that promising; sorry, Maverick City Music.)

Who knew that country music had its very own version of The Chainsmokers? Apologies to fans of Brothers Osbourne, but this felt like the most obnoxious elements of honky-tonk all rolled up into one exhausting ball of “yee-haw.” To end the show with this wet fart of a number was a bummer, though it did retroactively make us appreciate almost every other musical number more.

At first, it looked as though the Grammys didn’t allow J Balvin a budget, as “Qué Más Pues” started with just the artist (and guest singer Marîa Becerra) doing a “stand there and perform” shtick. Come on, Grammys—Olivia Rodrigo got a car! But after Becerra initially stole the show, Balvin launched into “In Da Getto” and got a much more visually engaging accompaniment from some seated arm-dancing friends. It was cool, but the rapper never seemed half as animated as he should have been.

Really? You’re going to ruin one of the catchiest songs of the night by starting it off like some somber ballad? It’s hard to think of a track less deserving of the self-serious treatment than “Peaches,” for fuck’s sake. Yes, he eventually got up and did the song proper, but the damage was done; what should’ve been fun as hell was rendered an unintentional parody, instead.

Chris Stapleton has one hell of a voice, but not one hell of a stage presence—at least, not on this telecast. It was perfectly serviceable, but we don’t think anybody will be adding this to the list of “great Grammys performances” any time soon. Why you gotta be so cold, indeed, Chris: A little showmanship never killed anyone. (Side note: Why does everyone think adding a string section to their songs makes them cooler? It does not.)

Lady Gaga came out to the big-band strains of “Love For Sale,” and promptly did one of the more jarring performances of the evening. She kept jumping styles of singing—even within the same song—making for a strangely off-putting overall effect. It’s as though she wanted to hit every tone and mannerism she’s ever delivered in jazz, and it was a little much. Okay, a lot much. (Admittedly, the heartfelt tribute to her partner in jazz, Tony Bennett, was nice.)

Considering how provocative Lil Nas X live at the Grammys could’ve been, the “Call Me By Your Name” artist was strangely muted, all things being equal. With a triptych of excerpts from his album (“Dead Right Now,” Montero (Call Me By Your Name),” and “Industry Baby”), he delivered a solid performance but nothing terribly memorable. Which is unusual for him.

This was a fine song—”Ghost Story” is a brand-new track from the country superstar—but you have to wonder which member of the Carrie Underwood team thought it would be a good idea to have her sing the song while a comically enormous, ghostly lit version of the performer hovered on the massive screens behind her. The effect was unintentionally very funny, which actually made us enjoy this performance a little more than we might’ve otherwise, though probably not for the reasons Underwood and company hoped.

Befitting his legend status, Nas was backed by a full big band locked into his groove, but unfortunately there wasn’t enough time to find out if that was a good move or not. He got in about 30 seconds of “I Can” before switching it up to “Made You Look.” Still, the rapper stepped it up once he segued to “One Mic” and reminded everyone how great he’s been for literal decades. “Rare” was just icing on the cake, shoehorned-in big band and all; no real flash, just substance—which is what Nas has been since Illmatic, way back in 1994. If only we got a better demonstration of it.

This was honestly a little awkward. It felt incredibly strange seeing Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy delivering a taped address about the horrors of war in his country; the whole evening stopped dead in its tracks to remind us that we should all be doing something else. (His last line, about wanting to be “Free like you on the Grammys stage,” may as well have been followed by Trevor Noah calling off the rest of the show for reasons of basic respect.) Thus, Legend’s performance of “Free,” joined by Ukranian musician Siuzanna Iglidan, couldn’t help but come across like an afterthought. We admire the effort, and it feels churlish to even place this song on the list, but as with many well-intentioned efforts, it was a jarring disruption of the tone of everything around it. We feel like jerks even saying anything negative about it. Let’s all move on.

Starting off with just herself and a microphone (buoyed on either side by a bass and keytar manned by legends Jimmy Jam and Terry Lewis) was already a cool move. H.E.R. soon moved to the drums, basically just to show off that she could. But she soon returned to the mic, delivering a touch of “We Made It” before ceding drum duties to Travis Barker for a duet with Lenny Kravitz on his “Are You Gonna Go My Way.” This is exactly the sort of goofball silliness for which the Grammys are tailor-made, so it was a welcome, albeit somewhat ridiculous, sight.

Brandi Carlile started at the piano for the first verse of “Right On Time,” before belting out a powerhouse note that spurred applause—and spurred the singer off her instrument and into a guitar strap, where some colorful lights and backing band (complete with string section) helped elevate the song. Plus, she just started laughing with glee when it ended, which was awfully endearing.

What, was she going to perform “Drivers License” and not start it inside a car? Olivia Rodrigo went for the obvious stage accoutrement, but it worked: This was a strong performance that managed to feel organic and potent, even with the hokey fake butterflies fluttering about over her head.

With an enormous cape flowing out behind him, Batiste followed many other performers tonight in starting off at the piano (was there some sort of requirement?). Thankfully, he soon took things into surprisingly exhilarating territory. Say what you will about the man’s music—it can be a little, um, corny at times—he knows how to put on a show. The candy-colored stage was transformed into the equivalent of a theater-kid tent-revival performance, as the musician threw the equivalent of the kitchen sink at the audience. Even when he got back behind the piano, it was a feint—more celebration was to come.

Wearing a Taylor Hawkins T-shirt, Eilish wandered through the inside of a facsimile of an upside-down hotel room flooded with water as she performed “Happier Than Ever.” Until, of course, she stepped out of it and onto the stage proper, for the song’s transition into its bombastic, arena-rock segment. It sure looked like Eilish was having fun, and all the sound and fury ended up signifying an above-average performance. Plus, the rain effect was a nice touch—if you’re going to turn it up to 11, may as well try for 12.

The opening number of the Grammys was also one of the best. Setting aside the fact that Anderson .Paak already deserves some sort of award for drumming and rapping simultaneously (and crushing it on both fronts), Bruno Mars and his partner in groove brought the house down with this number, a reminder that both are born showmen who also happen to have a knack for writing incredibly infectious funk-pop.

Look, this definitely might have been the best performance of the night. With laser-guided precision, BTS delivered what “energetic, polished, and deeply impressive. We might go so far as to suggest that these BTS kids might have some kind of future in the music business.” The spy-themed routine was a lot of fun, and the group’s effortless theater-kid smoothness made it even more so. But we’d be lying if we said another consideration for putting this at number one was knowing that the BTS Army has an entire wing of its online operations dedicated to harassing, threatening, and straight-up doxxing any journalist who dares to say anything even remotely critical about the group. Yes, it sucks, and it makes talking seriously about BTS difficult. But frankly, we’re not about to risk our family’s safety for a silly ranking, just because a bunch of K-pop fans can’t tolerate opposing points of view. So: “Butter” was great! And honestly, we mostly mean that without reservation!