In a truly inauspicious opening segment, 3000 Miles To Graceland begins with a credits sequence featuring two computer-animated, seemingly robotic scorpions doing battle under the blazing sun. Why? Get too bogged down with asking that sort of question, and Graceland will give you a headache in short order. Chances are it will anyway. A hyper-stylized, hyper-dreadful heist film starring Kevin Costner and Kurt Russell as criminals who may also be the illegitimate spawn of Elvis Presley, Graceland has the feel of a direct-to-video Tarantino knockoff, the look of a Bruckheimer-produced big-budget action film, and no heart whatsoever. Fresh out of jail, Russell gets friendly with outskirts-dwelling single mom Courteney Cox before teaming up with Costner to rob a casino. Joined by a handful of dispensable supporting cast members (David Arquette, Christian Slater, Bokeem Woodbine), they hit their target dressed as Elvis during a gathering of Elvis impersonators. After a violent, lovingly photographed shootout, they discover that keeping the money may prove more difficult than obtaining it. Soon Russell and Costner, with Cox and a wisecracking child along for the ride, square off in a cross-country battle of wills, as each struggles to maintain control of the loot. A veteran of music videos, Demian Lichtenstein directs as though attempting to squeeze every idea he ever had into one movie, lest he never be given a chance to make another. With any luck, he won't. Over the past decade, numerous films have employed music-video-style imagery with savvy and intelligence, incorporating visual flair as part of a cohesive whole. (Seven and The Matrix spring immediately to mind.) Graceland is an old-school flashback that presents a lot of flash and bother for its own sake. The story follows suit, employing not only Elvis imagery, but also Western and Rat Pack iconography simply because it can. There's a germ of a good idea in pitting a good Elvis against an evil one and letting them do battle (like, say, computer-animated scorpions), but Graceland simply tries to hitch a ride on the floating signifier that is The King. The cast's inability to stir interest in the immediately unlikable characters doesn't help, nor does Costner's villainous turn. Attempting evil incarnate, he seems more like an overworked dad in desperate need of a cocktail, and he never grows more convincing over the course of the film's all-too-generous running time. A year so young will no doubt produce worse films, but they'll have to limbo skillfully under the bar Graceland places perilously close to the ground.