It’s around 1 p.m. here in Chicago on Friday, August 14. Somewhere on some picturesque island, someone has lit up a big spotlight the color of Pantone 686 C to summon Wes Anderson from this studio in an abandoned lighthouse carefully stocked with thimbles and antique cameras. We suspect the Pantone 686 C signal is reserved for only the most important of Wes Anderson emergencies, and this definitely qualifies. Behold: a fox, in a library.
The next time someone asks you—and let’s be honest, that someone is probably you yourself—why you’re still on Twitter, you can answer in two words: “library fox.”
This is not a complicated story, and we are not here to add nuance or drop some fat statistics about foxes in populated areas or the percentage of libraries visited by foxes. This is a library fox. We’re just alerting you to its existence. Because it’s a library fox.
And you clicked on this story. Why? Because if there’s a story about a library fox, you click on it, that’s why.
So there’s the library fox. Alistair Robinson shared a picture of said library fox. (He also conspicuously did not share any grief-stricken posts about cats, so we assume no pets were harmed in the adventures of this library fox.) And now, should you choose, you can tell us all about the library fox and its hijinks. Is this library fox a guardian of the books? Is this perhaps more of a Ratatouille situation, and the little fox has a dream of becoming the next Agatha Christie? Perhaps the fox is losing the family homestead and needs to put on a show to raise money to pay of the badger-bankers, so came to the library in search of a copy of Arsenic And Old Lace? Maybe the fox is friends with a handsome rooster who is in love with a beautiful chicken and even though the fox is also in love with the chicken, it is helping its friend the rooster (who is a bit of an empty coop upstairs, if you know what we mean) to romance the chicken, whose name is Roxane? (This is a Cyrano de Bergerac joke, just wanted to make that clear.)
Please, tell us of the library fox. Have a nice weekend.