As usual, the Grammys liked all of that popular music that nobody admits they like

The Grammys are the biggest night of the year for music, at least as far as people tweeting about how much they don’t like popular music goes, so it’s a good idea to get caught up on all of the exciting things that happened during the show. Otherwise, you won’t have anything to not tweet about tomorrow, when the people who like to watch The Grammys are coming down from their post-Grammys high. “Do you know who won the award for Best Large Jazz Ensemble Album?” they’ll ask, and you’ll say that you don’t because you’re so cool, but actually you do know who won because you read articles like this. It was Gordon Goodwin’s Big Phat Band, by the way, and they definitely deserved it.

There were other awards given out than just Best Large Jazz Ensemble Album, though, and each one was just as exciting as it was. Tom Petty fan Sam Smith took home Best New Artist, Best Pop Vocal Album, Song Of The Year, and Record Of The Year. Tony Bennett and the increasingly relevant Lady Gaga took home Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album for Cheek To Cheek, St. Vincent won Best Alternative Rock Album, Eminem won Best Rap Album, and hardcore rocker Beck won both Best Rock Album and Album Of The Year.

The full list of winners is below, but before you start arguing about who won and who should’ve won, just remember that music is such a varied and subjective medium that it’s practically impossible to actually determine what songs were “the best.” However, Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me” is now, objectively, the best.

Record of the Year: Sam Smith – “Stay With Me (Darkchild Version)“

Song of the Year: Sam Smith – “Stay With Me (Darkchild Version)“

Album of the Year: Beck – Morning Phase

Best New Artist: Sam Smith

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance: A Great Big World With Christina Aguilera – “Say Something”

Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album: Tony Bennett & Lady Gaga – Cheek To Cheek

Best Pop Solo Performance: Pharrell Williams – “Happy”

Best Pop Vocal Album: Sam Smith – In The Lonely Hour

Best Rock Performance: Jack White – “Lazaretto”

Best Rock Album: Beck – Morning Phase

Best Rock Song: Paramore – “Ain’t It Fun”

Best Alternative Rock Album: St. Vincent – St. Vincent

Best Metal Performance: Tenacious D – “The Last In Line”

Best Rap Performance: Kendrick Lamar – “I“

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration: Eminem Featuring Rihanna – “The Monster”

Best Rap Song: Kendrick Lamar – “I”

Best Rap Album: Eminem – The Marshall Mathers LP2

Best R&B Performance: Beyoncé Featuring Jay Z – “Drunk In Love”

Best Traditional R&B Performance: “Jesus Children”- Robert Glasper Experiment Featuring Lalah Hathaway & Malcolm-Jamal Warner

Best R&B Song: Beyoncé Featuring Jay Z – “Drunk In Love”

Best Urban Contemporary Album: Pharrell Williams – Girl

Best R&B Album: Toni Braxton & Babyface – Love, Marriage & Divorce

Best Contemporary Instrumental Album: Chris Thile & Edgar Meyer – Bass & Mandolin

Best Dance/Electronic Album: Aphex Twin – Syro

Best Dance Recording: Clean Bandit Featuring Jess Glynne – “Rather Be”

Best Compilation Soundtrack for Visual Media: Frozen

Best Score Soundtrack for Visual Media: The Grand Budapest Hotel

Best Song Written for Visual Media: “Let It Go” from Frozen

Best Country Album: Miranda Lambert – Platinum

Best Country Solo Performance: Carrie Underwood – “Something In The Water”

Best Country Duo/Group Performance: The Band Perry – “Gentle On My Mind”

Best Country Song: “I’m Not Gonna Miss You”

Best Bluegrass Album: The Earls Of Leicester – The Earls Of Leicester

Best American Roots Performance: Rosanne Cash – “A Feather’s Not A Bird”

Best American Roots Song: Rosanne Cash – “A Feather’s Not A Bird”

Best Americana Album: Rosanne Cash – The River & The Thread

Best Folk Album: Old Crow Medicine Show – Remedy

Best Music Video: Pharrell Williams – “Happy”

Best Music Film: 20 Feet From Stardom

Producer of the Year, Non-Classical: Max Martin

Best Instrumental Composition: John Williams – “The Book Thief”

Best Arrangement, Instrumental or A Cappella: Pentatonix – “Daft Punk”

Best Arrangement, Instrumental and Vocals: Billy Childs – “New York Tendaberry”

Best Recording Package: Pearl Jam – Lightning Bolt

Best Boxed or Special Limited Edition Package: The Rise & Fall Of Paramount Records, Volume One (1917-27)

Best Album Notes: John Coltrane – Offering: Live At Temple University

Best Historical Album: Hank Williams – The Garden Spot Programs, 1950

Best Engineered Album, Non-Classical: Beck – Morning Phase

Best Remixed Recording, Non-Classical: John Legend – “All Of Me (Tiesto’s Birthday Treatment Remix)“

Best Surround Sound Album: Beyoncé – Beyoncé

Best Regional Roots Music Album: Jo-El Sonnier – The Legacy

Best Reggae Album: Ziggy Marley – Fly Rasta

Best World Music Album: Angelique Kidjo – Eve

Best Children’s Album: Neela Vaswani – I Am Malala: How One Girl Stood Up For Education And Changed The World

Best Musical Theatre Album: Beautiful: The Carole King Musical

Best Blues Album: Johnny Winter – Step Back

Best Spoken Word Album: Joan Rivers – Diary Of A Mad Diva

Best Comedy Album: “Weird Al” Yankovic – Mandatory Fun

Best New Age Album: Ricky Kej & Wouter Kellerman – Winds Of Samsara

Best Improved Jazz Solo: Chick Corea – “Fingerprints”

Best Jazz Vocal Album: Dianne Reeves – Beautiful Life

Best Jazz Instrumental Album: Chick Corea Trio – Trilogy

Best Large Jazz Ensemble Album: Gordon Goodwin’s Big Phat Band – Life In The Bubble

Best Latin Jazz Album: Arturo O’Farrill & The Afro Latin Jazz Orchestra – The Offense Of The Drum