Being On Shear Genius Is A Lot Like Drowning In A Sea Of Hair

By Amelie Gillette  |  April 18, 2007 | 4:49pm
Aux Features Hater

Few things are more degrading than being a contestant on a reality TV competition– except maybe being a contestant on Shear Genius, Bravo's rip-off of a rip-off of a rip-off of Project Runway.

Why? Well, besides the inherent shame of being a part of a competition judged by Jaclyn Smith and the woman (Sally Hershberger) who is best known for creating the haircut that made Meg Ryan look like a miscellaneous blonde street urchin in a touring company of Oliver! (seriously, how boring does your profession have to be if Bravo cycles through 3 seasons of fashion design, 2 seasons of cooking, and 1 season of interior decorating before finally getting around to it), being a contestant on Shear Genius means that Bravo can use your image to promote the show as it sees fit.

So if Bravo wanted to depict you floating away in a tidal wave of hair, for instance, there's nothing you could do to stop them.

Or if they wanted to put out an ad with you climbing up a wall made out of giant, shiny, blonde hair extensions, you would have to live with that.

It's the price you pay for the chance to hold the estimable title of "Shear Genius."

Other fun, hair stylist-y options Bravo didn't consider for the

Shear Genius ads:

—Giant scissors.

—Impaling each of the contestants on the prongs of an oversized comb.

—A massive shampoo sink.

—Putting the contestants in a large jar of Barbacide.

 
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