Chilli, Pepa score new VH-1 reality shows

If you're like us, you lie awake at night in a cold sweat, worried sick that prominent R&B has-beens of the eighties and nineties will never find true love. Fret no more, as Variety reports that VH-1 has just announced the pick-up of reality shows about Sandra "Pep" Denton and Rozonda "Chilli" Thomas.

Denton's show will follow the voluptuous sexpot as she ventures back into the scary world of dating following what the article describes as "four years of a 'self-imposed romantic and sexual dormancy.'" Sounds like my adolescence, minus the "self-imposed" part.

Thomas' show revolves around its star's search to find Mr. Right with the help of "relationship expert" Tionna Smalls. Yes, Thomas is looking for the man who will set her heart aflame, her hunka, hunka burning love, the Andre Rison to her Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes.

The basic-cable bottom feeder also order additional episodes of such Peabody Award-winning fare as Celebrity Fit Club and Sober House With Dr. Drew.

Vast wasteland my ass. Let's see Newton Minnow try to keep Tom Sizemore off the purple poppers and screaming meanies for a few weeks with cameras following his every move.

 
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