Dr. Dre releasing his own cognac later this month

Good news for everyone awaiting an update on Dr. Dre’s long-promised Detox: That album still isn’t coming out anytime soon, but at least you can forget all about it by getting shitfaced on Dre’s new signature cognac, Aftermath, which joins headphones and HP computers in the line of stuff Dre has been releasing instead of new music. Aftermath will arrive in stores later this month, to be followed by a an 80-proof flavored and unflavored sparkling vodka—a shot across the bow in the ever-escalating Vodka Wars that now substitute for creative competition.

 
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