Providing the ponderous, skyscraper-scaled thrashing—not to mention the warm holiday cheer of a blast of nuclear fire—that The War On Christmas has so long and sorely lacked, the El Rey network has announced the return of its now-annual Kaiju Christmas marathon. Kicking off on December 24, the Godzilla-heavy smash-a-thon will run for 96 hours over the holiday, taking viewers all the way from the original 1954 Gojira to 2004’s Godzilla: Final Wars (and back again, because there are, unsurprisingly, some repeats in this four-day long tribute to the enduring spirit and poor real-estate choices of the people of Tokyo).
Not unlike El Rey’s recent Thanskgiving Day marathon of kung fu flicks, this latest celebration of the Kaijuish faith seems like a pretty great way to hide from your monster-averse relatives over the holiday season. After all, nothing distracts from the passive-aggressive spectacle of Aunt Judy sniffing at your Uncle Roger’s taste in clothes, women, and holiday gift wrapping like the sight of a rubber-suited allegory for nuclear war punching a city-destroying moth in its giant, fuzzy face.
Here’s the lineup for the marathon, courtesy of El Rey:
Thursday, December 24:
6:00 AM ET/PT: “Gojira”
8:15 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: King Of The Monsters”
9:45 AM ET/PT: “Rodan”
11:45 AM ET/PT: “Ghidorrah: The Three-Headed Monster”
1:15 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Raids Again”
3:00 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Monster Zero”
5:00 PM ET/PT: “Mothra Vs. Godzilla”
7:00 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla’s Revenge”
8:30 PM ET/PT: “Terror Of Mechagodzilla”
10:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mechagodzilla II”
1:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mothra”
3:30 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Spacegodzilla”
Friday, December 25:
6:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah”
8:15 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. King Ghidorah”
10:30 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla”
12:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus: The G Annihilation Strategy”
2:45 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla, Mothra, And King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack”
5:00 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. ”
7:00 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Final Wars”
9:45 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla: King Of The Monsters”
11:30 PM ET/PT: “Ghidorrah: The Three-Headed Monster”
1:30 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Raids Again”
3:15 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Final Wars”
Saturday, December 26:
6:00 AM ET/PT: “Mothra Vs. Godzilla”
8:00 AM ET/PT: “Terror Of Mechagodzilla”
10:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mechagodzilla II”
12:30 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. ”
2:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mothra”
4:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Spacegodzilla”
7:00 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah”
9:15 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. King Ghidorah”
11:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla”
1:30 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus: The G Annihilation Strategy”
3:45 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla, Mothra, And King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack”
Sunday, December 27:
6:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. ”
8:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: Final Wars”
10:45 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla: King Of The Monsters”
12:30 PM ET/PT: “Ghidorrah: The Three-Headed Monster”
2:30 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Megaguirus: The G Annihilation Strategy”
4:45 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mechagodzilla II”
7:15 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Mothra”
9:15 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Spacegodzilla”
11:45 PM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. Destoroyah”
2:00 AM ET/PT: “Godzilla Vs. King Ghidorah”
4:15 AM ET/PT: “Rodan”