What you're missing if you're missing The Roseanne Show, America's strangest little-watched talk show.
February 28, 2000
In an episode paying tribute to Jamaica, Roseanne appears with beaded hair and chats with actress Sheryl Lee Ralph (Moesha) and Steel Pulse member David Hinds, informing the latter that, as an African, she relates to his music. She then brays the word "love" repeatedly. Hinds stares blankly. Roseanne joins him onstage for a song.
February 29, 2000
Still wearing beaded hair, Roseanne talks by phone with Antonio Sabato Jr. about his unusual leap-year birthday and informs him that he's fabulous. She then uses her psychic abilities to help the audience before sitting down with Species star Natasha Henstridge. Rutger Hauer and Scott Cohen join them for a silence-punctuated discussion of The Tenth Kingdom, in which Roseanne mentions her alien abductions and how they relate to the Kabbalah.
March 1, 2000
Decrying the censorship of "this TV paradigm," Roseanne attempts to make a "paradigm shift" by making her live debut as a rock star. She performs "My Generation," "White Rabbit," and a reggae medley of "Get Up, Stand Up" and "The Star Spangled Banner," interrupting most with shrieking spoken-word rants about various subjects. Prior to the performance, she receives advice from Gene Simmons and Janis Joplin's former roommate. Also featured: video footage of Roseanne recording her upcoming album I Just Can't Help Myself with an uncomfortable-looking Coolio.
March 2, 2000
Hair in several small pigtails, Roseanne has a brief but animated discussion via telephone with ex-husband Bill Pentland about his experiences with ghosts. She then talks with a squealing Debbie Matenopoulos. Awkward silence abounds. Later, the pair is joined by funnyman Kevin Meaney.
March 3, 2000
Wearing flowing, quasi-Egyptian garments and a beaded wig, Roseanne announces that today's show will be conducted in the spirit of Mardi Gras and Carnival. While taking phone calls, she repeatedly adjusts her makeup and eats an oatmeal pie. After talking by phone to New Orleans restaurateur Sam Scelfo and snacking on several desserts, Roseanne chats with fired Forgive Or Forget host Mother Love, who reveals that her dismissal was the result of a clash with her producers, then plugs her psychic hotline and talks about her sex life in great detail. Bridget Powerz, who bills herself as "the world's tiniest porn star," joins the two to talk about her career. Following a commercial break, Roseanne performs a nine-minute rendition of Bob Marley's "Exodus" in which she claims to be the reincarnation of Cleopatra, who has returned to liberate women.
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