When news broke that Fox will end American Idol after next year’s 16th season, TV-viewing citizens everywhere wrung their hands with concern over the show’s host, Ryan Seacrest. With Idol off his docket, Seacrest would have only American Top 40, On Air With Ryan Seacrest, Live From The Red Carpet, Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, and various production deals to occupy him, so it seemed certain that the host would go mad from inactivity. Luckily, Fox has stepped in to forestall this slide into decrepitude by ordering Knock Knock: Live, a reality show hosted and produced by Seacrest. The deal aims to ensure that Fox’s lineup will continue to be infused with Seacrest mojo, a yogurt-like substance that cannot be bottled, although scientists have tried.
Knock Knock is slated for a premiere on Fox this summer. On Twitter, Seacrest said that Knock Knock is “basically” live television, and the show will delight regular dirt people like you by offering them surprise encounters with money and celebrity—i.e., the things that Ryan Seacrest has and you don’t. So it’s an extended Publisher’s Clearing House commercial, with commercials. Seacrest won’t knock on any doors himself, of course. Too many germs. Deadline reports that instead, he will remain ensconced in a Los Angeles studio while his minions spread out across the country to execute his majestic vision. Because the only door Ryan Seacrest knocks on is the door of success. And who answers that door? Ryan Seacrest.