If you even moderately pay attention to video games, you have probably seen—and wondered what the fuck is going on with—Waluigi. A gaunt, purple, idiotic-looking shadow of Luigi, you occasionally see him popping up in memes, or screaming his beloved catchphrase: “WAAAA!” The above video from Did You Know Gaming? is a delightful primer to, um, Mario’s arch-nemeses’ tall friend(?), illustrating just how cheerily half-assed the character’s entire existence has been. Utilizing deep-cut asides from guide books and incidental in-game text as their evidence, they assemble a biography for the hapless goon, from his original invention as a tennis partner for Wario to his ongoing devolution into the franchise’s dumpster. Even his back-story is cobbled together from various leftover bits of lore from other characters and games.
At this point, his shittiness is central to his appeal; as the video notes, despite having appeared in over 50 games, he is the “only member of the regular Mario cast to never star in a game of his own or have any kind of role in the mainline Mario series,” which is sort of an accomplishment, when you think about it. His only consistent traits are his unfulfilled desire to be liked and his quiet yearning for Princess Daisy, who shits on him every chance she gets. His spaces in Mario Monopoly are the least profitable ones on the board. Everything about this character sucks. Nintendo’s only choice is to finally give him his own game, and make it an unplayable hellscape of glitches, frustration, and tedium. It is the most that he deserves.