Hopper, P.I. is the only Stranger Things spinoff we need
David Harbour’s Chief Hopper achieved his final form in Stranger Things 3, in which he gloriously evolved into the ultimate crossbreed of Dad/Daddy—it’s like, he’s such a dad, but you also want to call him Daddy? Lots of confusing feelings there, sort of like watching Michael Stuhlbarg in Call Me By Your Name, or Kyle Chandler in…anything. Among the many Dad Hopper scenes in Stranger Things 3, there is one that is Peak Dad: Hopper watching Magnum, P.I. Of course he watches Magnum, P.I.—dude also rocks topsiders, thinks a Hawaiian shirt with jeans and a blazer is the height of fashion, and yells at his daughter’s boyfriend. And that’s to say nothing of his mustache. Anyway, it turns out we weren’t the only ones enamored by Dad Hopper this season, as evidenced by this perfect mash-up created by Twitter user Eddie Spughetti. Friends and neighbors, please enjoy the hell out of Hopper, P.I.:
This is literally the only necessary Stranger Things spinoff. It is pure, unadulterated chef’s kiss material—the VHS style, “Joyce Byers as Wheelbarrow,” all that sweet, sweet aggro-mustache action. Screw Stranger Things 4. Does anyone actually care about Will or what happens with Mike and Eleven next season? Not nearly as much as we care about Hopper and the confusing feelings he inspires. Give us Hopper, P.I., you cowards.