It's a sign of trouble when watching a movie prompts nostalgia for the movie it's ripping off, particularly when that movie wasn't any good. But walking out of Johnson Family Vacation, it's hard not to feel misty-eyed for the urine-soaked-sandwich gags, incest jokes, and other refined comic elements of National Lampoon's Vacation. It was a lousy movie, but at least it knew better than to stake its fortunes on the crack comic timing of guest star Shannon Elizabeth.
Playing a harried L.A. insurance salesman attempting to make good time on the way to a family reunion in Kansas, Cedric The Entertainer leads a cast of hyphenates, all of whom look like they'd rather be working some other hyphen. Singer-Radio Shack enthusiast-actress Vanessa Williams plays Cedric's semi-estranged wife, who reluctantly tags along on his trip with dancer-celebrity sibling-singer-actress Solange Knowles in tow. As the youngest member of the family, Gabby Soleil seems not to have developed a sideline career, but Bow Wow's need to rap becomes a subplot unto itself.
Stitched together with regional stereotypes and gags lifted from other movies, the film follows the Johnson family through a rear-projection journey across the Southwest, where they encounter shifty Native Americans and a bug-eyed Elizabeth, who appears to be playing some sort of fusion of a hippie and a witch. Subplots involve Cedric's futile efforts to keep a souped-up loaner SUV from harm, his less-futile efforts to win back Williams' heart, a hyper-competitive big brother played by Steve Harvey, a Big Gulp-sized cup of urine, and (most desperately) a climactic talent show involving an all-family rendition of Coolio's "Fantastic Voyage." By the time the song winds down, it almost sounds like a taunt to those who've endured the journey, onscreen and off.