Jurassic Park 4 will defy science in 2014

Though its central premise has already been disproven by science, life and franchises, bluuuuhhhhhhhh, find a way, and so Universal has made official the long-rumored plans for Jurassic Park 4, scheduling it for June 13, 2014. The project still has Steven Spielberg attached as producer and overseeing a yet-to-be-chosen director, but beyond that details are still few and far between, other than the strong possibility that it will involve dinosaurs doing things. Dinosaur things. Things that do not involve suddenly mutating into dinosaur-human hybrids with differing attitudes toward wearing pants, as this is a premise too far-fetched even for a series steeped in engineering dinosaurs out of ancient DNA, despite everyone knowing that the half-life of DNA is way too short for that. One of the dinosaurs may even be ridden by Jesus, because fuck science.

 
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