Life is fleeting, but here's Heidi Montag's audition tape for Transformers 3 anyway

Look, it’s been a long day, and we’re still more than 48 hours shy of a holiday weekend. What say we just chill for a minute and watch Heidi Montag futilely audition for a part in Transformers 3? Despite the fact that director Michael Bay is said to be closing in on British Victoria’s Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley to replace the ousted Megan Fox, Montag continues to have her hand up (though to be fair, it’s one of the last parts of her body capable of fluid motion), insisting last week that she believes Bay is an “artistic brilliant genius” and doing everything she can to get him to seriously consider her.

In her audition tape (posted to her Facebook and picked up by RadarOnline), Montag enlists the services of American Defense Enterprises to help her prepare for her role—in “Transporter 3,” according to the retired ex-soldier or law enforcement officer who once upon a time served his country and his reward is this—by letting her stiffly run around and shoot a pistol at stationary paper targets, just like she’d be doing at those big robots in the movie! Montag posted the video to what she thought was Michael Bay’s Twitter page, whereupon it promptly made it out to the rest of the Internet to help you wile away the next 28 seconds of your life. Enjoy.