Lindsay Lohan, upset that Scary Movie 5 paints her as difficult, claims she has "walking pneumonia" to get out of it

In a turn of events akin to hiring Joe Pesci, then becoming surprised and disappointed when he turns up and "acts all Italian-y," the producers of Scary Movie 5 recently hired Lindsay Lohan to make an easy joke about how terrible it is to work with Lindsay Lohan, only to then complain about how terrible it is to work with Lindsay Lohan. According to the New York Post, Lohan reportedly "freaked out" over a screenplay that called for her to make a cameo mocking her personal troubles—a scene that ensured its topicality by also having her kiss Charlie Sheen—and, not taking kindly to the implication that she's unreliable and irresponsible, fought back by missing "every meeting she had," missing scheduled phone calls to discuss the script, and ultimately missing her flight to the Atlanta set for her one day of shooting.

Lohan also told producers that she had "walking pneumonia," a condition whose symptoms include coughing, a mild fever, and being too tired to kiss Charlie Sheen right now. Fortunately for the producers and people who enjoy seeing Lindsay Lohan laugh about herself under extreme duress, she finally made it to film her cameo after producers sent a private jet. "These stories are untrue, and she is willingly fulfilling all of her obligations," says a surely exhausted rep for Lohan who wakes up every day wondering when this will end.