In a thousand years or so, nobody is going to be able to say with any certainty whether or not Matthew McConaughey really existed. Everything about him is simply too uniquely weird for him to be anything but a folklore hero like Johnny Appleseed or Paul Bunyan. David Bowie’s whole thing was being weird, but we know he was real because that’s what made his weirdness so impactful, but McConaughey? He’s a space man philosopher who wins awards for acting, appears as the spokesperson for a famous bourbon brand, and then just floats around in the meantime studying the world and learnings its secrets like some totally chill immortal with an infinite amount of time to just do whatever. Who benefits from that being the description of a real person?
Anyway, the latest place to which the winds of fate have carried McConaughey is the Rio Olympics, where he’s passing the time by getting really into everything. Uproxx gathered up some McConaughey sightings from Brazil, and like everything he does, they’re simultaneously weird and stupid and kind of cool. Just look at this photo of him watching one of the swimming competitions:
That’s not a real guy, that’s some kind of god-king who has descended from Valhalla to see how his subjects live. Thankfully for us, he thinks our displays of athletic prowess are totally radical—but in an endearing way, like how we feel when a dog figures out how to open the pantry and steal treats. Here’s another photo of him telling his buddy Zeus to come down and watch swimming with him:
The great McConaughey is a caring overlord, but that doesn’t mean his love his unconditional. Just look at this chilling photo of him watching someone do a bad swim:
Uproxx also got this video of McConaughey being interviewed about rugby, and unsurprisingly, he’s a big fan of the way the little humans dart back and forth, making the most of the time they have left on this Earth:
There’s no word on NBC asking McConaughey to join its broadcast team like it did for Leslie Jones, but that’s probably because McConaughey can’t be tied down by a network like that. He’s just gotta be free, man.