Michael Richards' meandering, racist rant (and his meandering, painful apology) left me with many questions. Namely: "Why?" but also "What does Paul Rodriguez, a stand-up I haven't thought about, let alone seen since his inspiring turn as the friendly Latino bike messenger, Hector in Quicksilver, think of all this?"
Luckily, Rodriguez was not only witness to Richards' lowest moment, he was also available to talk to lots of reporters about the incident, so that
every single news story about it contains a quote from him:
"Once the word comes out of your mouth and you don't happen to be African-American, then you have a whole lot of explaining," Rodriguez told CNN while looking around for other news outlets to talk to, "Freedom of speech has its limitations and I think Michael Richards found those limitations."
But Rodriguez wasn't the only washed up-comic with an opinion about Richards (and a hunger for the bright lights and exposure that only CNN can provide). Sinbad, last heard as the voice of "Raven" in the straight-to-DVD classic Hansel & Gretel, also wanted to share his views on the matter with the television audience, and, really, anyone who can get him a job:
"Dude, you can't come up with that if you're not racist," Sinbad told the CNN reporter, unaware of the fact that his interview might only be shown online, "That's like me beating women and saying, "I love women!'" (Watch the whole video
here.)
Some comic named Larry Reeb (he's headlining at Zanies in St. Charles this weekend! No, really.) saw the chance to get some of his A-list, super-hot zingers in the paper, and grabbed it. He told the Chicago Sun-Times about hecklers:
"They are usually drunk and/or stupid.One guy was heckling me the whole time shouting, 'Talk about sex!' I replied: 'Your parents shouldn't have had it.' " A TV deal can't be too far behind!
George Lopez (of The George Lopez Show!) also had something to say about the incident, and actually it's the smartest comment made by all the dozens of comedians asked to comment:
"You have an actor who is trying to be a comedian who doesn't know what to do when an audience is disruptive," Lopez told an LA TV station, "He's an actor whose show has been off the air, he shouldn't ever be on a stand-up gig."
But what about the real-life "Kramer"? You know, the guy who did the "Kramer Reality Tours"?
How is he handling all this? Well, evidently, all you have to do is vaguely wonder about something, and The NY Daily News will dispatch a reporter to find out more than you ever wanted to know about it:
"Art imitates life imitating art imitating life," Kenny Kramer told the
Daily News from within his house of mirrors, "But he's not Kramer. I don't think his actions reflect on Kramer in the least. He's Michael Richards. Kramer is a television character."
"I think it's going to help [me]," he said. "I'm getting all this publicity!"
You're not the only one. I can't wait to hear what Carrot Top thinks of all this.