MTV, a very hip and with it televised-content subsidiary of the Viacom corporation, knows what the youth of today want. Increasingly, that has little to do with actually TV, which is why Teen Wolf is practically a social-networking platform first and a television series second. It’s also why the network took to Twitter to announce the official pick-up and premiere date of its show based on the Scream franchise, employing a series of emoji to depict the whimsical stabbing death of a woman in a red dress. It’s a breakthrough in popular entertainment publicity, sure to be followed by the first-ever upfront presentation composed entirely of Snapchats.
In order to reach viewers whose advanced age and macular degeneration make it too difficult to distinguish between the cat who’s crying one sad tear and the cat who’s crying two happy tears, the tweet release includes a helpful hotline number. By calling 310-461-4299, these surely obsolescent individuals—who still remember a time when the only reason they called MTV was to voice daily approval of Korn’s “Freak On A Leash” video—will hear the following message:
“Do you like scary TV? Scream is coming to MTV. October 2015.”
Their damn grandkids might be too busy sexting and twerking and going to the bodega with Taylor Swift to call and say “Hello,” but at least old, reliable Ghostface is there with a comforting, voice-distorting piece of PR. Or whoever Ghostface’s stand-in is, at least, as MTV’s Scream is reportedly too cool to use the mask that once terrorized its target audience’s parents and that woman from the “I’ll be there for you” show.
At press time, the smiling purple devil from the iOS emoji keyboard is still available to obscure the face of Scream’s new boogeyman.