New Line will just keep making Journey To The Center Of The Earth movies, thanks

Joining the desperate race to fill the future with an endless line of movies and sequels and deny the inevitable approach of the heat death of the universe, New Line Cinema has announced that it is planning a third and fourth movie in its Journey To The Center Of The Earth franchise, with scripts to be written by The Conjuring screenwriters Chad and Carey Hayes. Dwayne Johnson, who took over the lead role in the franchise from Brendan Fraser with 2012’s Journey 2: The Mysterious Island, is attached to star in both—because if he’s still making movies, he can’t die, right? He’ll live, young and beautiful, forever.

Since the films (to-date, anyway) are loosely adapted from the writings of prolific science fiction pioneer Jules Verne, there’s still plenty of material the producers can use to stave off those moments, late at night, when the whisper of their own deaths rings in their ears. “How about From The Earth To The Moon?” they might say, loudly enough to drown out their own thoughts. “Or A Floating City?”

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Josh Hutcherson, the only actor appearing in both of the previous Journey movies, is also expected to return, although the Hunger Games star hasn’t been formally attached to the project. But where else can he go? Where can any of us go? Only to the movies, and then to our graves, and hopefully in that order.

 
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