“No touching!” The cast of Arrested Development visits Inside The Actors Studio.

Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Thursday, November 7. All times are Eastern.

TOP PICK
Inside The Actors Studio (Bravo, 7 p.m.): There’s one drawback to James Lipton’s sit-down with the cast of Arrested Development: Lipton himself is also a cast member. Which means this episode will undoubtedly turn to anarchythe line between host and guest becoming irreparably blurred, sending the very premise of Inside The Actors Studio crashing to the ground as Lipton sits in the corner whispering “I’ve made a huge mistake.” (Either that or Lipton will have a lovely conversation with creator Mitch Hurwitz and cast members Will Arnett, Jason Bateman, Portia de Rossi, Alia Shawkat, Jeffrey Tambor, and Jessica Walter.)


REGULAR COVERAGE
Once Upon A Time In Wonderland (ABC, 8 p.m.): Jafar gets a flashback episode this week, which will hopefully give Naveen Andrews more to do than just sneer menacingly while holding a snake staff. Zack Handlen thinks a more nuanced Jafar could open up “A Whole New World” for this show.

The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 8 p.m.): Bob Newhart returns as Professor Proton alongside (drum roll please) Bill Nye the Science Guy. Oliver Sava has his bowtie and Bunsen burner at the ready.

The Vampire Diaries (The CW, 8 p.m.): Elena wants Silas to bring Bonnie back from the dead. Carrie Raisler wants this season to find a central focus. Hopefully both goals will be achieved in tonight’s episode, “Handle With Care.”

Reign (CW, 9 p.m.): Mary may be able to get out of her engagement, but the plan requires her to sentence a man to death. If someone doesn’t yell “Off with his head!” Caroline Framke is going to be pretty miffed.

Glee (Fox, 9 p.m.): In the first post-Finn-memorial episode, the kids have to decide if they’re more like Katy Perry or Lady Gaga. After careful consideration, Brandon Nowalk has decided he’s more of a Robyn.

Michael J. Fox Show (NBC, 9 p.m.): Chris Christie guest stars on an episode called “Bed Bugs.” There’s probably a mean-spirited joke in there, but Robert David Sullivan prefers to keep politics out of his NBC sitcoms.

White Collar (USA, 9 p.m.): This week Neal goes undercover to spy on a psychiatrist. Which makes this the perfect time to announce that Neal has also been living undercover as Kenny Herzog for several years now.

Elementary (CBS, 10 p.m.): Rhys Ifans makes a welcome return to Elementary when Mycroft Holmes arrives in New York to enlist the help of Sherlock and Watson. Myles McNutt will be wearing Ifans’ scuba diving ensemble from Notting Hill to mark the occasion.

Scandal (ABC, 10 p.m.): Fresh off of hosting SNL, Kerry Washington returns to the white hat (and jacket and pants) of Olivia Pope. Sonia Saraiya has a fish bowl of red wine ready and waiting for the talented actress.

Parenthood (NBC, 10 p.m.): Kristina tells Amber a story about her relationship with Adam in this week’s episode, “Speaking of Baggage.” Speaking of baggage, Todd VanDerWerff has a lovely Louis Vuitton monogrammed luggage set he’s looking to sell.


TV CLUB CLASSIC
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (11 a.m.): After a brief hiatus, Zack Handlen returns with more thoughts on the finest space station in all of space. We know you have been missing these.


WHAT ELSE IS ON?
Guinness World Records Unleashed (TruTV 8 p.m.): In the premiere of this new series, someone eats breakfast while bungee jumping because apparently no one cares about the integrity of Guinness World Records anymore.

Something To Talk About: JFK: A President Betrayed: (DirecTV, 8 p.m.): DirecTV’s documentary series has already chronicled Sean Penn’s relief work in Haiti as well as the highs and lows of online poker. So it seems only natural that the series release an episode that posits government officials subverted Kennedy’s goals to withdraw from Vietnam, negotiate with Fidel Castro, end the Cold War, and basically save the planet. Sure they did, DirecTV, sure they did.

The Voice (NBC, 8 p.m.): NBC is attempting to help its ailing Thursday-night schedule by airing a live Voice results show as a lead-in to Sean Saves The World and The Michael J. Fox Show. So while it’s not really The Voice’s fault there won’t be any new Parks & Recreation episodes until November 14, feel free to send all your angry letters directly to Carson Daly anyway.

The Greatest Event In Television History (Adult Swim, Network 12 a.m.): Adam Scott’s third Greatest Event In Television History will feature Chelsea Peretti, Kathryn Hahn, Jon Glaser, and Catherine O’Hara paying homage to a classic TV series. Although the chosen show remains top secret, Scott revealed it is “by far the stupidest one we’ve done yet. Almost embarrassingly stupid. Hopefully in a funny way.”

8 Mile (VH1, 6:30 p.m.): The Marshall Mathers LP 2 was released two days ago, which is the perfect excuse to revisit the rapper’s 2002 film and reminisce about that time Eminem won an Oscar for Best Original Song.

A Farewell To Arms (TCM, 8 p.m.): This movie was released 1957. It stars Rock Hudson and Jennifer Jones. It was based on book by Ernest Hemmingway. Unlike the novel, the film is considered overblown. Writing like Hemmingway is hard. We tried.

NBA Basketball: Lakers at Rockets (TNT, 9:30 p.m.): This is Rocket’s player Dwight Howard’s first game against the team he left last season. If this were a movie, he would have an emotional reunion with his former teammates, which would give him a new sense of self-worth. Since it’s real life, he’ll probably just play basketball against them.


IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Mad Men: Todd VanDerWerff is traveling back in time—not only to the 1960s, but also to 2007, when Mad Men premiered on AMC. He’s covering the first season of the show for TV Club Classic, starting with the pilot “Smoke Gets In Your Eyes.”

 
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