It’s hard to get too excited about anything involving the Trump White House, given that it is being slowly assembled piecemeal by an enfeebled racist grifter whose worldview is informed with an almost parental comprehensiveness by “things he sees on Fox News.” And yet it’s also hard not to feel a slight uptick in hope, if not because of the newly empowered teenage boy who has taken over the reins of the administration then because of who he has taken them from: sentient shitpost Steve Bannon. First Bannon was removed from the National Security Council, then stories began to circle about apple-cheeked golden boy Kushner openly feuding with Bannon, who, by point of contrast, looks like one of those eyeless fleshy things fishermen find in the deep ocean. Now, adding to all of that, Trump has weighed in with a firm vote of no confidence, telling the New York Post:
“I like Steve, but you have to remember he was not involved in my campaign until very late. I had already beaten all the senators and all the governors, and I didn’t know Steve. I’m my own strategist and it wasn’t like I was going to change strategies because I was facing crooked Hillary.”
That is some cold shit, but richly welcome for a man who openly admires Darth Vader and Satan and helped turn Breitbart into a sort of a neo-Nazi stronghold. The general consensus, currently, is that Bannon is increasingly isolated in the White House, and perhaps on his way out, meaning it is the perfect time for people to shit all over him on the internet. It is pretty much all about how he looks, which: good, fuck this guy, he looks like an old Band Aid. Take it away, mean internet people:
It’s difficult to roast Steve Bannon when his skin is so overcooked already. #RoastBannon pic.twitter.com/Jw2qFayj9Q
— Laura (@SheWhoVotes) April 13, 2017
Steve Bannon is a human windowless van. #roastbannon
— Millard Fillmore (@potusfillmore) April 13, 2017
This one feels especially raw:
You get the picture, right? Fine, here’s one more.
This is something of an old parlor game, given Bannon’s disheveled, vaguely decomposing personal style. Back in January, “Steve Bannon Looks Like” made the rounds with some extremely hard and well-deserved owns on the nation’s new Senior Hentai Advisor:
But back then, he was still malevolently whispering things like “ban all Muslims” into the commander-in-chief’s ear. At least for the time being, he’s lost that direct line. Please celebrate by shitting on him in his time of trial.