Person Of Interest will save the whole damn world one last time, you ungrateful jerks
Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Tuesday, June 21. All times are Eastern.
Top picks
Person Of Interest (CBS, 10 p.m.): It all feels like it went by much too quickly—probably because CBS basically figured out a way to air this final season over a long weekend—but Person Of Interest is ready to walk out that door with its head held high, possibly after blowing up everything up or saving everyone, depending on how the mood catches it. We’re big believers here that the end of any decently long-running show is an opportunity not to mourn an ending but to celebrate all the good times, and Person Of Interest has had its fair share of those. Well, maybe not “good,” exactly, given how dark this show could get. But hey, the finale has Finch, Reese, Fusco, and Shaw teaming up one last time to stop Samaritan, and if that doesn’t sound exactly how Person Of Interest would want to go out, we don’t know what would be. LaToya Ferguson is standing by one last time.
The Greeks (PBS, 9 p.m.): The first episode of this three-part documentary miniseries traces the earliest and most often overlooked section of Ancient Greek history, as bands of Mediterranean hunter-gatherers developed Europe’s first writing system and mastered the seas long before Greece’s world-altering Golden Age. We’re guessing there’s going to be a lot of momentous slow pans across pottery shards while dramatic music plays, and we’re being completely serious when we say we’re totally pumped.
Copa America Centenario: U.S. Vs. Argentina (FS1, 9 p.m.): Yes, a rare sports top pick, but this could be a great one. (Or a total bloodbath, also a possibility.) The host American side has made it to the semifinals of this special centennial edition of the tournament pitting the best national teams throughout the Americas against one another. So now the shorthanded U.S. squad has earned a match against Argentina and Lionel Messi, one of maybe five players in history with a solid claim for greatest of all time. This could be the one opportunity ever to see the U.S. go up against Messi at the height of his powers in a match with real stakes, so even the most casual of sports fans might want to consider tuning in for this one.
Premieres and finales
Pretty Little Liars (Freeform, 8 p.m.): The seventh season begins, and we’re not sure there’s much to tell you about this that just saying the episode title is “Tick-Tock, Bitches” doesn’t already accomplish.
Bizarre Foods With Andrew Zimmern (Travel, 9 p.m.): The world still hasn’t run out of foods that sound both terrifying and oddly intriguing, as Zimmern opens the 10th season with a trip to Madrid for baby pig heads, organ omelets, and duck liver jewelry. Back in our meat-eating days, you probably could have talked us into trying any of those, but then we’re very, very dumb.
This Is Mike Stud (Esquire, 10 p.m.): Not really our sort of thing, but if you’re interested in an eight-part reality series about a former Duke baseball player turned YouTube hip-hop star as he and his entourage navigate their first big tour… well, that’s pretty much exactly what This Is Mike Stud has on offer.
Greenleaf (OWN, 10 p.m.): Even Oprah Winfrey’s network is getting in on the trick of launching a show on Tuesday night before moving it to another regular night (Wednesdays, in this case), as the first half of a two-night premiere kicks off tonight. This particular show takes us inside the world of a black megachurch in Memphis, as the estranged daughter of the powerful bishop returns home after years away to discover things are exactly as corrupt and immoral as you’d expect a Memphis megachurch in a basic cable drama to be. Winfrey herself has a recurring role on the show, but the real casting highlight here is Keith David as the bishop…
Sorry, don’t know what came over us. Anyway, that’s Community, Enlisted, and mother-bleeping Gargoyles star Keith David as the bishop…
Let’s just move on. Our real point is that Keith David is a national treasure.
Regular coverage
The Mindy Project (Hulu, 3:01 a.m.)
Hey, you guys see the latest wrestling? Don’t worry, we’re here for you
We won’t let recency bias run away with us and say this is the greatest promo of all time—that’s got to be this or maybe this, or actually, no, definitely this—but we do feel that all champions in all sports should be required to cut Dean Ambrose’s promo after winning that long-awaited title. LeBron James in Cleveland, Dustin Johnson at the U.S. Open, Phil Kessel in Pittsburgh, all celebrations would be infinitely better with an endearingly rambling monologue about wrecked cars, unmentionable topics, and how they really, really need a drink. Hell, let’s just make this the new presidential inaugural address.
Streaming pick
Whose Line Is It Anyway?, “Episode 101” (CW Seed): Normally, we like to use the streaming pick to end What’s On Tonight on a happy note, but tonight we must use this section to bring your attention to perhaps the biggest scandal in internet history. It appears CW Seed is going around claiming to have “Every Whose Line Ever,” and no amount of well-placed asterisks pointing to a “Made In The USA” fine print is going to excuse the fact that there’s not a single damn original British episode on there. Don’t you dare disrespect Clive Anderson like that, CW Seed! Clive Anderson is, like Keith David, a damn national treasure! He may not be our national treasure, but that’s no kind of excuse. Anyway, we’ll send around a Doodle pretty soon to figure out what’s the best time for us to all go protest this injustice, so be on the lookout for that.