Popular iPhone app Angry Birds will be made into a movie, because that's just how it works these days

The Angry Birds iPhone app that has briefly distracted the populace from tearing its collective eyes out from boredom will be made into a movie, because it is currently popular and thus ideal fodder for storytelling. Oh, who are we kidding with our preemptive cynicism—what with their fancy computers, they can make movies out of literally anything nowadays.

And at least this one already has a faint shade of a plot, as anyone who’s watched the in-game trailer (as seen below) can tell you: Angry Birds is a tale of vengeance and slingshots, set in a world where pigs and birds have become bitter enemies after one of the pigs, who’s a king or something, steals the birds’ eggs. The birds then seek their revenge by launching themselves into the pigs’ impractically elaborate fortresses made of rocks and precariously balanced sticks and glass shards—and while that’s obviously not much to go on so far, the app’s parent company Rovio already has plans for “a large cross-merchandising franchise” that includes a possible feature film as well as animated shorts along the lines of “Aardman Animation or Pixar,” so expect that back story to get fleshed out considerably. Maybe we’ll finally learn why there’s that one mustachioed pig who looks like Wilford Brimley. What's up with that?