How badly do you want—nay, need—to hear Taylor Swift’s re-recordings of her back catalog? On a scale of one to “I bought the folklore sweater months ago,” how big of a fan are you, really? That mischievous little vanilla pudding cup Miss Taylor herself would like to challenge that devotion with an endurance test that fully embraces the consumerist nature of your relationship: A Match.com ad written by Ryan Reynolds. If you really want to hear Swift’s re-recording of “Love Story,” you’ll have to sit through an ad first. Or half of one, because it kicks in about halfway through what feels like a feature-length film of a commercial (and one of those where you’re like, this didn’t need to be almost two hours)—and that’s not even the whole deal because the love story in the ad is between Satan and 2020, depicted here as a woman when we all know damn good and well that if 2020 were a person it would be an obnoxious white man, and specifically Eric Trump.
Good for Satan and all, but the real story here is that we should probably keep Ryan Reynolds away from ads, lest we forget the offense that was Rick Moranis’ long-awaited return to the screen in a mobile phone ad. Taylor Swift’s re-record sounds great, though.