"That Guy From Step Up 2: The Streets" Now To Be Known As "That Guy From Step Up 2: The Streets With The Burnt Penis"
Every celebrity who has been profiled by magazines numerous times has their own special way of making the interview truly theirs—a personality quirk played up for dramatic effect, a signature move or manner of speaking that gives the interviewer the impression that he/she is talking to a real person instead of a jumble of publicist-approved phrases encased in skin. George Clooney always launches the Clooney Charm Offensive™, regaling interviewers with tales of how he placed fake plastic vomit in strategic locations all over Don Cheadle's trailer when they were filming Ocean's 12, or whatever. Jennifer Lopez always leads with her mellifluous fake laugh, or with a story about one of the many times she has fake laughed so hard. Owen Wilson walks out.
Of course, these celebrities have all had many years and many magazine profiles to hone their signature interview moves. Channing Tatum, the guy from Step Up and Step Up 2:The Streets has not. But in a recent interview with Details, Tatum tested out a particularly shameless and repulsive move that will almost certainly become his default signature: Showing the interviewer pictures of his scalded penis on his iPhone.
Movie stars tend to be vain, by nature and profession, but Chan—that's what everyone calls him—does not mind one bit showing me his sad, withered wiener. "It was the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life," he says, flipping through photos on his iPhone until he lands on a grainy snapshot of a scorched member. His scorched member. "I'm good . . . now," he says with a grin. "Now my penis is fantastic! One hundred percent recovered. Put me back in the game, Coach."
Good one, Chan, I mean, Guy From Step Up 2: The Streets, I mean, Guy From Step Up 2: The Streets Who Has A Burnt Penis. I guess we can expect to see "[Channing Tatum shows me a picture of his scalded penis on his iPhone]" in every Channing Tatum Q&A from now on.
Still, Channing Tatum won't be known as The Guy From Step Up 2:The Streets Who Has A Burnt Penis forever. According to his imdb, in a couple years he'll be known as The Guy From Parkour: The Movie Who Has A Burnt Penis, because apparently there's a movie called Parkour that's being made, because apparently so far the universe is allowing something like that to happen.