The children are mad online about Star Wars again

The children are mad online about Star Wars again
Photo: Lucasfilm

While speaking with her pal Josh Gad during an episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live, Daisy Ridley confirmed a previous rumor about the original plans for Rey’s lineage in the Star Wars franchise: apparently she was almost the granddaughter of Obi-Wan Kenobi, which, yes, probably would’ve been better than Rey Palpatine—but literally anything would’ve been better than reviving a withered old corpse and beating it to death again. Speaking of which! That’s kind of what’s happening on Twitter now, as the Discourse has been awakened to have its bones picked apart once more.

In the clip below, you can see the inciting incident yourself, as Ridley explains, “At the beginning, they were toying with an Obi-Wan connection.” She goes on to confirm that her character’s background wasn’t cemented before they made this expensive-ass trilogy: “There were different versions and at one point she was no one… it kept changing.”

This of course is News because people are fucking bored right now and honestly, social media just hits different so take those tiny endorphin rushes where you can—but damn, can these children find something more interesting to whine about in the timeline? Spin the wheel, pick literally anything else so we can stop writing about that very dumb and bad Star Wars movie. Here are some ideas:

  • How is Ryan Reynolds so famous?
  • Why is TLC making us wait until October to see the rest of 90 Day Fiancé: The Other Way? Clearly they have saved all the juicy drama for the back-half of this season and it is unreasonable.
  • There’s also always the option to redirect this energy toward genuine problems like systemic racism, the upcoming election, all the immigrants and refugees who are still being held in detention centers in our country, the chronically unhoused, climate change—the possibilities are truly endless.
  • The normalization of Crocs.
  • Max Landis. Remember Max Landis? Now there’s an old problem that could probably use another thorough dunking or two.

 
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