College professor Jeff Bridges can't think straight when he's in relationships with women like Elle Macpherson—a problem to which many men can relate. So he seeks out fellow college professor Barbra Streisand, who's brilliant and a great professor, but who doesn't look like Elle Macpherson. They get married and have an intellectually stimulating platonic relationship. But when he goes away and she touches up her hair, diets, applies make-up, and spends a few weeks in the gym, she's suddenly a luscious Pierce Brosnan magnet, bathed in the warm, candlelit glow that surrounds all movie characters played by Barbra Streisand. The problem with The Mirror Has Two Faces isn't Streisand's well-documented ego, or the movie's indirect, probably unintentional message that beauty makes all the difference when it comes to who loves you and why. It's that, at 130 minutes, it's long and plodding, with far too many cliches—the age-old spit-take scene, and so on—and inexplicable plot points. (Why does a middle-aged, presumably wealthy Columbia professor live with her nasty, conniving, unsympathetic mother?) Streisand fans may appreciate it, but those dragged to the theater by Streisand fans will spend two hours and ten minutes seeing if they can stuff their hands through their chairs' cup-holders.