Lucifer. Beelzebub. Old Scratch. Dick Cheney. No matter what you call him, the Devil generally gets a bad rap. Some folks blame him for all that's wrong with the world. Others claim he's evil incarnate. But is he really bad, or merely misunderstood? As always, it's best to look to the movies (and a couple of TV shows) for answers, as we do in the latest installment of The A.V. Club's ongoing "The Movies Answer Your Questions" series.
Heaven Can Wait (1943)
The good: When Don Ameche shows up at the gates of hell demanding to be admitted due to his lying, womanizing ways, the Devil (Laird Cregar) turns him away, because Ameche is really no worse than any other man.
The bad: Give the Devil credit for listening to Ameche's whole life story before rendering judgment. But since Ameche really wants to be punished, the Devil denying him might be the unkindest cut of all.
Devilish detail: Cregar's Lucifer lives in an elegantly decorated hell and demands to be called "Your Excellency."
Final verdict: This Devil's a real peach, more concerned with fairness than soul-harvesting. (Or maybe that's what he wants you to think!)
The Last Temptation Of Christ (1988)
The good: Disguised as an angelic little girl, Satan fills Jesus in on God's real plan: Christ was meant to get married, have kids, live to a ripe old age, and inspire The Da Vinci Code.
The bad: It was all a dream sequence. And Harry Dean Stanton, as the apostle Paul, spreads the word about Jesus' death, resurrection, and ascension no matter what Jesus does.
Devilish detail: When Martha tempts Jesus with a little adultery, Satan tells him that there's only one woman in the world, but she has many faces. Nobody but the Prince of Darkness could come up with such a diabolical rationalization for sleeping around.
Final verdict: Satan made Jesus realize that he was supposed to die on the cross; if that hadn't happened, then Jesus never could have conquered his doubts and gone on to a triumphant death. Like Last Temptation's Judas, this Satan ultimately serves God. Take that, Manichaeism!
The Devil And Daniel Webster (1941)
The good: Walter Huston's countrified Satan is an unmistakably American demon who readily concedes to a proper trial, complete with judge and jury, after one of his victims (James Craig) hires famed lawyer and orator Daniel Webster to represent him before a jury of the damned.
The bad: Huston plays on mankind's worst instincts, stoking Craig's materialism, lust, and envy to poisonous, soul-corrupting levels.
Devilish detail: Like the Lucifer immortalized in Charlie Daniels' "The Devil Went Down To Georgia," Huston plays a mean fiddle. Also, he isn't averse to purloining the occasional pie. Huston's son, John, went on to play an unforgettably Satanic power broker in Chinatown. Meanwhile, a seemingly damned Alec Baldwin-directed 2001 remake of The Devil And Daniel Webster may never be released due to legal problems. Lastly, in The Simpsons' parody of this story, the Devil is played by Ned Flanders.
Final verdict: Huston's Devil is evil, but it's hard to avoid respecting a devil with such a solid sense of fair play.
Angel Heart (1987)
The good: The Devil is played by Robert De Niro, back when that meant something.
The bad: De Niro hires private eye Mickey Rourke (back when that meant something) to look for a singer who owes him a debt. Here's a hint: the debtor isn't a soul singer, but he does have soul. At least for now.
Devilish detail: De Niro's character's human name is Louis Cyphre. Get it?
Final verdict: Is the Devil's endless quest to harvest human souls really evil, or is it merely a natural malignancy, like cancer or the music of Andrea Bocelli? Turn to the back of your metaphysics textbook for the answer.
The Twilight Zone—"The Howling Man" (1960)
The good: An American (H.M. Wynant) traversing post World War I Europe encounters a castle where a seemingly harmless old man (Robin Hughes) is imprisoned for being the Devil. Wynant becomes convinced that Hughes is an innocent victim of crazed superstition, and releases him…
The bad: …at which point, Hughes transforms into his devilish self and escapes the castle to wreak havoc on mankind in the form of WWII, the atom bomb, and the brief popularity of Tab Hunter.
Devilish detail: "The Howling Man" was written by science-fiction great Charles Beaumont, who also penned the Twilight Zone episode "Printer's Devil."
Final verdict: Evil, evil, evil. They don't call him the Great Deceiver for nothing.
Bedazzled (1967)
The good: Peter Cook makes an amiable, charming sort of Devil—he's a fast-talking salesman sort, but not in a creepy or pushy way. He actively seems to enjoy his clients, his work, and his lightly absurdist one-liners.
The bad: He's out to buy Dudley Moore's soul in exchange for seven wishes, then undermine the results of those wishes so Moore doesn't ever get what he truly wants. But hey, there's no malice involved. It's just his job, and he's got a quota to meet if he's going to honor his longstanding deal with God.
Devilish detail: Much to Moore's consternation, Cook's version of the Devil is refreshingly unconcerned with image, intimidation, or even formality. When Moore asks Cook to produce an "ice lolly" to prove his Satanic might, Cook just takes him to a vendor and buys him one. When Moore suggests he should sign his soul-contract in blood, Cook says mildly, "Blimey, you are a traditionalist."
Final verdict: Would you sell a used soul to this man? Well, come on, why not? He isn't evil, he's just a regular-guy working-man with a devilish sense of humor.
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Damn Yankees (1958)
The good: In Stanley Donen's delightful adaptation of the hit musical about a Washington Senators fan who sells his soul to become a superstar slugger, Ray Walston's sly Devil is less a glowering deity than a tireless con man working a long, long grift. Besides, the Devil isn't responsible for the casting of wooden Tab Hunter in the film's lead. Or is he? (Cue spooky music…)
The bad: In spite of his twinkling eyes and unassuming manner, Walston is out to destroy humanity and steal souls. And in his big showcase number, "Those Were The Good Old Days," Walston mischievously delights in history's darkest moments.
Devilish detail: Walston's curiously earthbound, none-too-powerful Beelzebub has to plug a pay phone full of coins just like puny man-animals. Being the king of hellfire, though, he's a whiz at producing a pre-lit cigarette.
Final verdict: Oh, Walston's puckish Devil is evil all right, but like many of the scene-stealing devils here, humanity's scourge is a film's salvation.
Futurama (1999-2003)
The good: First introduced in the episode "Hell Is Other Robots," Futurama's Robot Devil appeared a few more times on the show, most notably in the episode "The Devil's Hands Are Idle Playthings," where the Beelzebot helps Fry master the world's trickiest instrument, the holophonor, by giving Fry robot hands.
The bad: But in a twist out of "The Gift Of The Magi," the swap-meet continues until Leela, whom Fry is playing the holophonor for, winds up deaf and betrothed to the Robot Devil.
Devilish detail: In "Hell Is Other Robots," the Robot Devil settles a dispute in true devil fashion, by holding a fiddle contest.
Final verdict: Oh, he's bad, but the Robot Devil only hurts you so you'll learn your lesson. That lesson? Irony sucks.
Limit Up (1989)
The good: Danitra Vance uses her dark powers to help plucky-but-spineless Nancy Allen achieve her life's dream of becoming a commodities trader and cornering the soybean market.
The bad: But at what price? Oh yeah, her eternal soul.
Devilish detail: Never before has a devilish figure expressed so much interest in the international soybean market.
Final verdict: Inconclusive. In a closing twist, it turns out that Vance isn't the Devil at all, but rather an angel masquerading as evil to bring about good. How perfectly devilish! And convoluted!
Highway 61 (1991)
The good: When a pair of Canadian misfits smuggle a corpse filled with cocaine across the border, a demonic fellow named Mr. Skin (Earl Pastko) sets out to retrieve it, having purchased the soul of the deceased. Pastko prides himself on buying souls as cheaply as possible—sometimes for as little as a bottle of whiskey—and, um, thriftiness is a virtue, right? Sort of?
The bad: Pastko makes no effort to hide his contempt for humanity; he takes Polaroids of the souls he's purchased, which he then shuffles flamboyantly.
Devilish detail: Pastko's Devil is probably the only one in film history who's also a bingo enthusiast.
Final verdict: Mr. Skin may or may not be the actual Devil, but he's one mean son of a bitch all the same.
South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999)
The good: South Park features one of the most sympathetic Satans of all time: He's just a big red doof in a bad place (hell) and in a bad relationship (with Saddam Hussein), and he's doing his wussy-but-determined best to escape both. He's even philosophical about his role in the grand scheme of things: In a big production number mocking all those Disney-movie songs about melancholy protagonists getting out into the great big world, he sings "What is evil anyway? / Is there reason to the rhyme? / Without evil there could be no good, so it must be good to be evil sometimes…"
The bad: Unfortunately, he can only leave hell for greener pastures by unleashing hell on Earth, resulting in calamity and bloody mayhem for humanity.
Devilish detail: He may be cinema's only Satan in buttless chaps, though Viggo Mortensen's Lucifer in The Prophecy was pretty slutty too.
Final verdict: Nicest Devil ever. And fun at parties! Just hope he doesn't bring the boyfriend. Or the evil minions.
Constantine (2005)
The good: When mankind is about to fall to the wrath of the Devil's son, supernatural detective John Constantine whistles up a creepy Satan (Peter Stormare) to yank the kid home and save the world. Which Satan obligingly does. As a bonus, he cures Constantine's lung cancer. Nice, right?
The bad: Well, no. There isn't much explanation for Stormare instantly grounding his son, but given that he's a particularly creepy, drippy, slavering Satan, he's pretty obviously doing it for his own ends. He certainly cures Constantine for his own ends—to keep him out of heaven and give him more chances to damn his soul on Earth.
Devilish detail: This Devil gets a particularly creepy entrance: He stops time, hovers barefoot above the ground, and drips hot black goo. It makes it all the more unsettling when he turns out to just be Peter Stormare in a white suit.
Final verdict: Constantine's Devil certainly isn't a good guy, but he's apparently easily maneuvered into helping the good guys out. Maybe he just missed his calling as a hero.
Ultimate verdict: The Devil is pretty definitely evil. But sometimes being evil isn't the same as being bad.