The only way Endgame will satisfy fans is if Ant-Man blows up Thanos' big purple ass
The upcoming Avengers: Endgame is set to devote 1/8th of a goddamn day toward assaulting its audience’s eyeballs with a technicolor showdown between a selection of Marvel superheroes and Thanos, a super buff California Raisin most notable for wreaking havoc on the galaxy in last year’s Infinity War. While this may seem like the sort of extended run-time necessary to detail the Avengers’ no-doubt difficult battle against the powerful villain, the internet has devised a Thanos-toppling theory that would not only end the film in minutes, but turn Endgame into a landmark moment in 2019 global culture, too.
How would this work? Well, Ant-Man, making good use of his ability to turn himself tiny or huge, would shrink down a whole lot, scoot on up into Thanos’s giant purple rectum, then suddenly grow large enough to make him explode from the inside. Got it? Good.
As detailed in an article by Vox’s Allegra Frank, this concept was born on Reddit, where it began with a post that proposed Hulk don Ant-Man’s suit, jump into Thanos’s mouth, travel through his body, and then blow up his dick from the inside. With a little alteration—ditching the Hulk and specifying an extremely villainous anus as a better mode of ingress—it’s now become a solidified theory and spread thoroughly enough to warrant its own Know Your Meme page.
It was also used as a way to explain why Ant-Man didn’t appear in Infinity War.
This tweet, to our delight, resulted in Paul Rudd reading and commenting on the possibility that his character could become the mightiest of all Marvel heroes by using this unorthodox combat strategy.
With next month’s Endgame release creeping ever closer, the internet has revived this theory, holding it close to its collective, degenerate heart and hoping against hope that we live in a world surprising enough to allow for a multi-million dollar blockbuster film franchise to include an expensive, CGI scene of an alien man being defeated by his ass blowing up.
Anyone bursting for more about this theory, including decidedly tamer comic book precedent, is encouraged to read the full article.
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