There's a scene early on in Penny Marshall's remake of the 1947 holiday favorite The Bishop's Wife that tells you all you need to know about the movie. In one of The Preacher's Wife's many superfluous musical segments, Whitney Houston rehearses with a children's choir performing a Christmas pageant. Already a sugary scene, Marshall punctuates it with a shot of a tiny, cross-eyed, heavily bespectacled girl grinning widely. She might as well have followed it with a shot of puppies frolicking in a field with bunnies and adorable ducklings, just in case the audience somehow missed the point. While the original was sappy—any movie about an angel returning to earth to help a struggling clergyman is going to be—it worked because of its fine performances. Denzel Washington occasionally gets to show that he can play comedic scenes, but he has two big things working against him: a treacly, simplistic script and Whitney Houston, whose acting ranges from delighted surprise (eyebrows raised) to sulking anger (brow furrowed). Houston may be the only performer with an ego enormous enough to seem condescending while singing to God. And she does plenty of singing, both in character and on the soundtrack; it's almost as if she's hovering, godlike, over the film. The climax even finds her stepping into the role of the Virgin Mary. Ave Whitney. God help us, every one.