With all the predictability of a zombie smashing through a window and devouring someone you’ve grown to love, AMC has announced that it’s renewed The Walking Dead for a seventh season. (We like to imagine network president Charlie Collier sitting on a giant pile of money, looking at the ratings numbers for the single most popular show in the history of cable, and pretending to debate for half a second about making this choice.)
Answering the philosophical question, “If a zombie kills a beloved character in a forest—or a dumpster, or whatever—and no one’s around to chat with celebrities about it afterward, does it make a sound?,” the network has also granted a new season to Chris Hardwick’s panel show Talking Dead. Both series will presumably return next fall, along with the already-renewed spinoff Fear The Walking Dead, and then the fall after that, and the fall after that, until everyone you’ve ever loved—on the show, or whatever—is dead, and the series’ rotting corpse is finally laid to rest.