Good news for fans of entirely inappropriate uncle-niece relationships and canned laughter: There’s a Full House porn parody now, God help us all. WoodRocket, a company that basically makes all of its money by asking crude facsimiles of pop culture icons to have sex with each other, has teamed with PornHub to release—we kid you not—Full Holes, which it calls “a sexy satire of one of the most popular sitcoms of all time.”
According to a press release, Full Holes stars porn luminaries like Allie Haze, Michael Vegas, and Kassondra Raine as various members of the Tanner clan, though the names have been “sexily” modified. Haze, for instance, plays “BJ,” while Raine plays “Muffchelle.” Other not-so-cleverly-named characters include Stuffme, Handy Tanner, Jizzy, Blowey, Kimmy Gobbler, and Fucky Donaldson. A group of Hawaiian-shirted dudes called the Bi-yotch Boys even make an appearance to sing “Strokamo,” though in this case the song features lines about getting covered in “love juice” instead of indulging in whatever Monserrat mystique is.
Never content to let an easy joke slip by, WoodRocket has even brought back Uncle Joey’s wood-crazed woodchuck puppet Mr. Woodchuck, though in this scenario, he’s become Mr. Woodcock, an eerie facsimile of the original spouter of classic lines like “Did somebody say wood?”
There’s a supposedly safe-for-work trailer of Full Holes below, though we recommend you wear headphones and angle your monitor away from anyone who might have even the tiniest inkling as to how adult sexual relationships work.
Full Holes Official Trailer (SFW) from Pornhub TV on Vimeo.