Things that do not rock: Camp Rock 2, School Of Rock 2

Making open mockery of the word, today came news of two sequels to movies with "rock" in their title—neither of which, by definition, particularly rock. The first was inevitable: Camp Rock, the latest phase of Disney's nefarious plan to create a Golem powered by the squeals of prepubescent girls, was a smash hit right out of the gate, so by the time it premiered you can bet The Jonas Brothers' pure virgin blood was already drying on a contract for the sequel. But the second project is leagues more, um, evitable: School Of Rock 2—a proposed follow-up to that sort-of-funny Jack Black vehicle which already had a nice beginning, middle, and most importantly, end—is reportedly on the table, with writer Mike White admitting that the very idea brings even him to tears:

"I actually just completed a draft of what's potentially the sequel, and I'm still, like, crying as I'm writing the script," he said. "I try to come at it from a personal place…Every time you're creating something, you're always thinking, 'What is the pleasurable part of this? What is the theme that's going to resonate with people?' I've had experiences where I loved what I did, and no one came. And times when I said, 'This could use some editing,' and everybody loves it. Our job is to pretend we know what everybody wants to see, but I don't know. So with this, you want to have a reason to go to the well again. You want it to not just be a reason so people can cash in. But at least now I have a better sense of what it was we created–what worked and what didn't. I can kind of reboot it."

 
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