Suggesting that high-fructose corn syrup may no longer be enough, and that we may soon be venturing in the worlds of ultra- or even hyper-fructose, the Carolina Beverage Corporation—makers of Southern mainstay Cheerwine—have announced a partnership with Krispy Kreme Doughnuts. The two companies will do for taste buds what the bakery chain’s name has already done for spelling, by bringing doughnut-flavored soda onto the market once again.
“Cheerwine Kreme,” as the alchemical abomination is known, is already making its way into stores, apparently, with shelf-stockers presumably unaware of the sugary apocalypse they’re carrying in their arms. The soda—normally cherry flavored—carries the “perfect hint of Krispy Kreme’s Original Glazed flavor,” and serves as an inversion of the two company’s last collaboration, 2010’s equally monstrous Cheerwine-flavored Krispy Kreme.
It’s worth noting that this isn’t actually the first time the world has faced the horrors of a doughnut-flavored soda. The mad men and women at Jones Soda Co. unleashed “Jelly Dougnut” flavor on the earth back in 2007, violating every international flavor treaty on the books. But Jones also serves up beverages flavored like sweat, dirt, and turkey, so maybe we don’t need to follow them down every single tongue-destroying path. (All that being said, if you live somewhere where they sell Cheerwine, send us some, because this stuff sounds pretty tasty, too.)