This Thanksgiving, Make A Lovely Centerpiece Out Of Your Helpless Baby

A while back on her show, Martha Stewart showcased the talents of a young designer who could whip up some of the most beautiful, creative, intricate centerpieces just from everyday household things and basic crafting items that nearly everyone has on hand, such as: felt, construction paper, old pillowcases, and helpless infants who haven't yet learned to crawl away when mommy's making a joke outfit.

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I don't know why this video is so creepy. Well, actually, I know exactly why this video is so creepy: it features overhead shot after overhead shot of a table full of babies dressed like over-sized food products, their chubby arms and legs squirming beneath the giant foodstuffs that have become their prisons. The turkey-baby is especially disconcerting.

It's undeniable that these days many people are having babies just for the jokes, which is their right. If someone wants to birth a child just for the Heelarious laffs, that's their choice. After all, babies can be pretty boring little blobs sometimes, and they won't remember if you make fun of them anyway, so what's the harm? But do the jokes always have to be so bad? Do they always have to come in the form of hokey costumes? I can't decide which is more groan-worthy: dressing your baby up as a caesar salad centerpiece, or putting them in a political onesie. Obviously babies are billboards for their parents' personalities, no need to irritate everyone around you by emphasizing that fact.

UPDATE: The video is, apparently, pretty old. Fortunately, being creeped out by food-babies never is.

 
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