A guide to what we’re barely putting up with this week.
The return of NBC’s ridiculous, enjoyably campy Blacklist. It’s basically Smash but with action sequences instead of musical numbers.
The coming of age in a futuristic hellscape tale, The Maze Runner. There comes a time in every teen’s life when he has to grow up and break out of his soul-crushing dystopia.
Lifetime’s ill-conceived makeover embarrassment, Girlfriend Intervention. A.k.a., Sassy Black Lady Eye For The Lame White Girl. Any time there’s a person identified as a “soul coach” on TV, something somewhere has gone wrong.
The new/old The View reboot. Even Barbara Walters can’t be bothered to care about “hot topics” anymore. Let it die.
Outrage over pumpkin spice flavored Oreos. There are berry flavored Oreos with filling so bright pink it looks like fabric softener. There are green mint Oreos that look like liquefied leprechaun. Orange cookies that taste like pumpkin pie are one of the more normal things Oreo has made.
The semi-annual return of The Voice. Again? Just when you think the reserves of aspiring trill ers and yell-singers have been completely exhausted, the musical chairs spin around to find more people who think they can sing.
Fox’s thoroughly uninteresting outdoor-Big Brother “social experiment,” Utopia. Oh, Fox. We’re living in a post-Naked And Afraid world. “Will these strangers be able to build a fake society?” just isn’t a compelling question when there’s a show where people are wandering around Madagascar, nude, looking for a snake to kill for food.