It's a legal matter, baby: Today's entertainment news is awash in reports of celebrities headed to the courtroom. Here are some of the highlights:
– The Hannah Montana tour—far and away the hottest ticket of the year for some reason—continues to break tweenage hearts across the land, and now thousands of fans who couldn't get in thanks to scalpers are fighting back with a lawsuit against the Miley Cyrus Fan Club, which they allege promised them priority for seats at the cost of a $29.95 annual membership fee. The suit argues that the defendants "should have known that the site's membership vastly exceeded the number of available tickets." The defendants responded by saying, "Yeah, but we still have plenty of Billy Ray Cyrus tickets to go around. That's adequate compensation, right? Hello?"
– A 55-year-old female stagehand who made a brief cameo in the little-seen mockumentary Pittsburgh is suing to stop the film being shown on cable and for distribution of the DVD to end until her scene is cut. Debbie Sue Croyle contends that the brief scene in which she appears—where she affixes a microphone to Jeff Goldblum after rubbing alcohol on his skin and blowing air on it—contains a sexual innuendo made by Goldblum that she was not aware of until after seeing the movie, and it has apparently "humiliated and embarrassed in her employment and personal life by the use of her likeness and by the portrayal of her" ever since it began airing on Starz. Wait…people watch Starz?
– Boy George has been charged with false imprisonment for keeping a male escort, Auden Karlsen, chained to a wall in his apartment. According to The Sun, "the '80s idol allegedly produced whips and sex toys and told a terrified Auden: 'Now you'll get what you deserve.'" Luckily, Karlsen managed to escape after "wrenching a hook out of the wall." (Cue flood of "Do you really want to hurt me?" jokes.)