Trump skipped the White House Correspondents’ Dinner to talk shit about the White House Correspondents’ Dinner
Like a guy who dumps a girl, but can’t stop bringing her up to everybody he meets, President Donald Trump devoted an unhealthily healthy chunk of his speech at a rally in Pennsylvania tonight—ostensibly set up to distract people from tonight’s White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner—to talking about the White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner.
“As you may know, there’s another big gathering taking place tonight in Washington, D.C.,” Trump opened, speaking to his dedicated audiences of boo-ers and cheerers. He then proceeded to give a greatest hits version of all the things he doesn’t like about that mean old elitist media he used to court, with its glamorous Hollywood celebrities and its Washington insider journalists. He doesn’t even know why they used to date! He’s got “beautiful, clean coal” and the crowd—the “much, much larger crowd”—to keep him company now.
Like any good would-be pick-up artist, Trump trotted out his usual media negging—fake news, lying media, the “failing” New York Times—while repeatedly emphasizing how boring the actual dinner must be, and how he doesn’t even want to be there, because he gets to be in Pennsylvania with “real” Americans instead. He then tossed a little bone to all those dumb jerks missing out on his awesome company, saying that “Maybe we’ll make it more exciting for them in Washington and show up” next year. Then again, “There’s a good chance we’ll be showing up here again next year, too,” he added, because Donald Trump doesn’t even want to get back together with the media, even if they begged him to. Why do you ask? What have you heard? Were they talking about him? OMG.