VH1 gets an early jump on 2000s nostalgia with I Love The 2000s

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I Love The 2000s (VH1, 8 p.m.): Following the precedent set by the VH1 version of I Love The ’90s, four years have passed since the end of the last decade, thus granting our nation’s talking-head comedians and cultural commentators the proper distance to snark on the previous decade. Never mind that the network already tackled this material in 2008’s weirdly timed I Love The New Millennium—the freshness date on Sherrod Small’s jokes about the Shake Weight is due to expire any minute now. Clearly, this is of tremendous programming urgency, like all of the airtime devoted to the Y2K bug back in the day. Speaking of which…

Survival (all day, everyday): In a world in which governments, corporations, and families did not heed the warnings of Leonard Nimoy or thirtysomething’s Ken Olin, the CBS corporation did not last long enough to take the nation by storm with its adaptation of European reality hit Survivor. Instead, a different form of outwit, outplay, outlast takes precedent on a daily basis, as survivors of massive power grid and economic failures fend off radioactive mutants and tend the fields of an agrarian society overseen by self-appointed king Richard Hatch.

Fargo (FX, 10 p.m.): Oh, it all comes down to this, don’cha know? Todd VanDerWerff and Zack Handlen have just had such a super time with Fargo, they wish it would last a little longer—fortunately for them, this finale runs for 90 minutes.

Playing House (USA, 10:30 p.m.): We’ve been quite taken with the charms of this buddy comedy by Jessica St. Clair and Lennon Parham, but never quite found a way to work it into the regular rotation. Following up on her pre-air review of the show’s first two episodes, Molly Eichel delivers (eh? Eh? Because Parham’s character is pregnant…) a take on the show’s first-season finale.

The Shield (Classic): Who else loves the 2000s? TV Club Classic Tuesdays loves the 2000s! Brandon Nowalk’s “circa 2005” ride along continues…

The Office (Classic): While Erik Adams jumps ahead to 2007 and a rough stretch of road for the people of Dunder Mifflin.

Degrassi (TeenNick, 9 p.m.): Further evidence of time’s unyielding march: Degrassi episodes are now named after ’90s songs, like tonight’s “How Bizarre.”

Rizzolli & Isles (TNT, 9 p.m.): Detective Rizzoli wrapped up her stint with the other separate but equally important group of the criminal justice system in 2001, right around the time Dr. Isles was romancing a budding filmmaker and ugly crier named Dawson Leery.

Perception (TNT, 10 p.m.): Perception star Eric McCormack, meanwhile, was picking up an Emmy for his work on Will & Grace, years before it was discovered that the Canadian-American actor (and background extra in the 2000 Barenaked Ladies’ video, “Pinch Me”) had the proper collection of eccentricities to assist the FBI in solving its most complicated Chicago-based cases.

The Fast And The Furious: Tokyo Drift (Spike, 6 p.m.): I Love The 2000s, Movies Edition Part 1: In which we marvel at the way seeming cash-in Tokyo Drift not only reinvigorated the Fast And The Furious franchise, but also reformatted the series’ entire timeline.

W. (TMC, 8 p.m.): I Love The 2000s, Movies Edition Part 2: In 2008, director Oliver Stone capped off his own lame-duck decade—in which the 10 years that gave the world Natural Born Killers and JFK were followed by World Trade Center and Alexander—with a biopic about a lame-duck president who was still in office at the time of this film’s release (thus marking the only notable thing about W.).

2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil: Russia vs. South Korea (multiple networks, 5:30 p.m.): Oh, to revisit those carefree days of the early 2000s, when only one of these competing nations had connections to a peninsula a terrifying instability…

The Tournament Of Episodes begins in earnest as Josh Modell judges the play-in match between Arrow’s “Three Ghosts” and True Detective’s “The Secret Fate Of All Life.” Todd VanDerWerff also has a Surprise Top Five with Beau Willimon, which finds the House Of Cards showrunner spontaneously naming his favorite political comedies.

Erik Adams posts a pre-air review of the Disney Channel original series Even Stevens to his personal Angelfire page, which was previously a repository for WAV files from Mystery Science Theater 3000 reruns called “Erik’s Box Of Hamdingers.” Even Stevens is a family comedy headlined by newcomer Shia LaBeouf, a rising star who’s sure to have years of conflict free, 100 percent original work ahead of him in his showbiz career.

Emerging from the period between Twin Peaks and The X-Files that David Duchovny probably wishes more people forgot about, it’s The Red Shoe Diaries season-one DVD set. It’s a new release that arrives obsolete, thanks to other distribution methods and the depraved depths of the Internet.

Switched At Birth/The Fosters: For the next few weeks, Carrie Raisler will tackle both of ABC Family’s Monday night shows in a single review. Want her to keep doing so? Keep commenting on and reading these reviews!

The Y2K Bug: A total bust, but it was still a pretty hellish decade nonetheless.