In a heartwarming display of industriousness, hard work, and love of craft, more than 60,000 people have applied to roll blunts for rapper Waka Flocka Flame. The international talent search was inaugurated by the performer back in September, when he posted an Instagram request calling for talented blunt artisans to submit their resumes for the $50,000 a year position. Despite rumors that pretty-boy fame jockey Seth Rogen had secured the gig, Flame apparently still hasn’t found the perfect person to roll his marijuana, and also maybe hold it and get sent to jail if the cops find them with it.
Now, the hard-partying rapper and Brick Squad star must do what he does best: thoughtfully vet thousands of resumes, sifting through Ivy League degrees and detailed blunt blueprints to find the master roller hidden somewhere among the chaff. “Sure,” he might say, as he and his bodyguards thoughtfully pass a bottle of Hennessy around a mahogany table strewn with curriculum vitae and professionally photographed blunt portraits, “This guy has the academic credentials. But does he have The Heart Of The Blunt?” The others will nod sagely, sigh, and the great blunt hunt will continue.
Or, he could just say screw it, and get the people at Funny Or Die to do it, if this video of the rapper looking through actual submitted resumes is to be believed:
Waka Flocka Flame Hires a Blunt Roller from Funny Or Die