Have you ever wondered what Gwar would be like if they were Finnish and forced to write 3-minute pop songs?
Well, look no further. Here's Lordi, the winners of the 2006 Eurovision song contest, a Finnish hard-rock group that managed to squeeze monster masks, extendable pterodactyl wings, flame-throwing guitars, and the lyric "It's the rock-alypse" into a three minute song called "Hard Rock Hallelujah."
For the wings alone they deserved to win.
In case you're wondering, the Eurovision Song Contest is a competition between around 40 European countries to find "The best song in Europe." It's been around for 51 years, and has sucked almost as long. The whole thing is sort of a long-running campy joke in Europe, albeit one that every country fights tooth and nail to win.
Anyway, pretty soon you're going to know exactly what it is, because in keeping with the American tradition of re-tooling campy Euro game shows for US audiences (see Deal Or No Deal, Pop Idol, and The Weakest Link), NBC has bought the rights to develop Amer-o-vision (or maybe just American Vision), with each of the 50 states submitting an entry for "Best Song in America."
I personally think this could only be annoying. And unlike Eurovision, we won't even be able to make fun of other countries struggling to use the English language comprehensibly in song (past winners have included "Boom Bang a Bang," and "Diggi Loo Diggi Ley".)
But, then again, I don't watch American Idol, either, so I'm probably biased. What do the rest of you think?