The
breathtakingly stupid Weezer begs the question: Is this for real? Or are the
over-processed hooks and lobotomized lyrics intentional self-parody? When Rivers Cuomo
sings, "So turn off the TV, 'cause that's what others see, and movies are
as bad as eating chocolate ice cream," is he a comic genius feigning creative bankruptcy? (C'mon, look at
the crrrazy album
cover!) Either way, it doesn't matter. If the so-called "Red Album" really is
an elaborate goof on an all-too-forgiving fan base, that doesn't make Weezer's
newest worst album any less insipid.
Peaking
early on Weezer's untouchable first two records, Cuomo now seems unable (or
unwilling) to write a single heartfelt song. Instead, he substitutes smarm for
sentiment on embarrassing dreck like "Heart Songs," paying tribute to
everyone from Nirvana to Debbie Gibson (while mistakenly referencing a Tiffany
song) with an air of insufferable, ain't-I-a-stinker smirkiness better suited
for the likes of Bowling For Soup. Even after the apparent bottoming-out of
2005's Make Believe, Weezer
is a dispiritingly awful record. The contrast between pap like "Pork And
Beans" and "Everybody Get Dangerous" and the hilariously
twisted, emotionally pent-up songs the band was once known for has never been
starker. The blame for Weezer can't all be laid on Cuomo—his bandmates' songwriting
contributions (particularly Brian Bell's Uncle Kracker stab "Thought I Knew")
are just as unforgivably soulless. Together they punch holes in Weezer where the heart and brain should
be.