Amazon’s Lord Of The Rings to debut with two episodes to rule them all

The world has changed. We see it in the water. We feel it in the Earth. We smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for Jeff Bezos bought it all, including the rights to roughly 10,000 years of Middle Earth history, the masterwork of literary genius by J.R.R. Tolkien. And for the next two months, he owns every ring-obsessed Hobbit, Dwarf, human, and Elf with the release of his $500 million television show, The Lord Of The Rings: The Rings Of Power. Come this September, or Halimath, as we Shire folk call it, viewers will finally get to determine whether all that money spent rebuilding Númenor was worth it.

On September 1 at 9 p.m. Easter Daylight Time, Amazon will debut the first two episodes of The Rings Of Power, offering viewers nearly a whole Peter Jackson’s Hobbit worth of Middle Earth fun. Following that, one new episode premiers every week. The plan gets an added benefit deep in the run. Because the release schedule runs seven weeks instead of eight, Amazon avoids having their finale occurring on the same weekend as Thrones’ season capper. The Rings finale will drop on October 14, roughly a week before the Thrones’ backlash kicks in.

Bezos’ pricey gamble at the next Game Of Thrones will debut roughly two weeks after the new Game Of Thrones, House Of The Dragon, a prequel series about the fair-haired dragon-freak family of Targaryen. As a result, the world’s two most significant fantasy properties will square off in a bout for cultural supremacy not seen since Volcano and Dante’s Peak came out in the summer. Will the righteousness of the Elves defeat the bleach blonde creeps known as the Targaryens? Only time will tell. But at least no one will be committing any Crimes Of Grindlewald.