Conservatives hate woke Barbie, but Greta Gerwig wishes them well

To the consternation of Whoopi Goldberg, conservatives hate Barbie. “It’s a doll movie, guys. I’m shocked that that’s what’s freaking you out these days,” Goldberg said on The View on Tuesday (via Variety). But is it really so shocking? Greta Gerwig’s Barbie is pro-feminism, and even the most basic, entry-level feminist ideas are antithetical to the right-wing outrage machine. Someone who makes a living from espousing conservative political ideology necessarily has to denounce any and all ideas to their left, even and perhaps especially if it comes up in frivolous kids’ media. It’s part of the business model.

Would we even know who Ben Shapiro was if he didn’t pull stunts like burning a bunch of Barbies in protest of the movie? Surely, The View would not bother with him if he wasn’t saying things like Barbie is “angry feminist claptrap that alienates men from women, undermines basic human values, and promotes falsehood all at the same time.” The outsize reaction to a film that offers a fairly surface-level critique of societal sexism is part of the grift. Right-wing pundit picks ridiculous target for his ire, left-leaning media gives him the attention he so craves, right-wing audience gains a martyr to protect and puts money in his pocket. Rinse, wash, repeat.

Unfortunately, ignoring the outrage machine has become nigh impossible, particularly when it comes to Barbie. It’s the biggest movie of the year, and the biggest opening for any female director ever. (Presumably to the chagrin of Ben Shaprio, who predicted that Barbie’s box office was “absolutely going to fall off a cliff.”) Women artists tend to be more scrutinized anyway, especially when their work has overt or even covert feminist themes. Barbie was an inevitable lightning rod for discourse, even without Ken’s (Ryan Gosling) exploration and ultimate rejection of “patriarchy.” Add in that buzzword, and it’s pure catnip for some of the most obnoxiously vocal online commenters out there. (“If you take a shot every time Barbie says the word ‘Patriarchy,’ you will pass out before the movie ends,” X-Chief Twit Elon Musk posted on whatever his platform is called these days.)

Hilariously, The View’s current resident conservative panelist Alyssa Farah Griffin—who formerly served in President Donald Trump’s White House—had the most cutting critique of the conservative Barbie backlash. Praising Gerwig as “brilliant,” Farah Griffin said on the show, “I’m so taken by some of these right-wing men who have all these thoughts on masculinity. Like, somehow, the Barbie movie is going to make them feel emasculated. No, caring so much about it is honestly the most emasculating thing I could think about it.”

Meanwhile, Gerwig herself seems touched that anyone cares. Speaking with the New York Times, she claimed she didn’t anticipate the “woke” criticism. “Certainly, there’s a lot of passion,” she said diplomatically. “My hope for the movie is that it’s an invitation for everybody to be part of the party and let go of the things that aren’t necessarily serving us as either women or men. I hope that in all of that passion, if they see it or engage with it, it can give them some of the relief that it gave other people.”

It sure gave them something—another platform to preach from, a Barbie to (literally!) burn at the stake—but relief doesn’t seem to be part of it. But more power to Gerwig, for trying to get through to the Ben Shapiros of the world.