Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters 

Though the somewhat-tepid response to Snow White And The Huntsman suggested that audiences are not exactly clamoring for dark retellings of fairy tales, and the absolutely abysmal reaction to Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter all but confirmed lukewarm interest in seeing mash-ups of familiar names hunting supernatural things, Paramount already made Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters, so here it is anyway. Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton play the all-grown-up fabled kids who now hunger for automatic weapons the way they used to for candy, and stalk the woods coolly tossing guns at each other while hunting for more witches to burn, then walk away from in slow motion. Judging by this trailer, Dead Snow director Tommy Wirkola shares their endless fascination with artillery, as its filled with almost more click-clacking than actual dialogue. That the studio banished Hansel And Gretel to the woods of early January probably says everything about its own affections.