Jack Reacher

Answering some of the questions left open by the first Jack Reacher teaser—besides, "Seriously, they had to cast Tom Cruise as a character whose intimidating size is his most defining characteristic?" (which is mostly rhetorical anyway)—here's a more plot-driven look at the Lee Child adaptation, in which everyone shrinks in Tom Cruise's shadow for a change. Also, a slightly more Werner Herzog-driven look, as he finally shows up as the very Werner Herzogian villain who spurs Cruise's Reacher to set aside his "I'm not a hero" drifting and muscle car-racing to rescue some blonde woman. Regrettably, Herzog only gets a sparse moment of dialogue in this, hissing, "A soldier is asking questions no one else would ask. Get the lawyer." Which is a narrative non-sequitur so unsettling, we're not entirely convinced Werner Herzog isn't just playing himself, and hunting Cruise down for all the past mediocrity he's unleashed upon the cinematic world. This movie looks sort of fun. That would be more fun.