Joe Rogan's "flexibility" extends beyond willingness to eat horse medicine, apparently
Spotify host Joe Rogan asserted this week that he's flexible enough to perform auto-fellatio
Joe Rogan is a flexible man. This, at least, is hard to contest: There have been very few ideas (and even fewer bad ideas) that have floated across the internet over the last decade or so that Rogan has not found space for in his giant, smiling head. From transphobic rhetoric, to the thoughts and wisdom of Alex Jones, to a whole host of COVID-19 misinformation, Rogan has shown an incredible ability over the years to contort himself into some of the most awkward positions imaginable.
Which, speaking of: Guess who’s now claiming he can suck his own dick?
This is per The New York Post, reporting on a recent episode of proud Spotify product The Joe Rogan Experience, in which Rogan casually asserts to comedians Ari Shaffir, Mark Normand, and Shane Gillis—the latter of “Being a cast member of Saturday Night Live for about 25 minutes before people found his old YouTube videos” fame—that said ability was within his reach. (Among other things.)
Now, obviously, a free-form chat between four comedians is going to involve a fair amount of bullshit, especially in a shit-rich environment like Rogan’s show. But the host—clutching and puffing on his cigar, apparently sans irony—appears to have been completely sincere in his claims, asserting that, “I’ve put it around my face just to know I could do it,” and pointing to his apparently documented ability to do the splits as evidence.
Rogan’s guests for the episode appear to be a mixture of disbelieving and amused by his assertion—Shaffir, hilariously, notes his own skepticism by pointing out to Rogan that, “You don’t have a neck.” But Rogan seems completely confident in his claims.
And, really: Is there a more perfect distillation of the entire Rogan brand of “rugged, masculine individualism stretched like a thin plastic mask over child-like vulnerability and insecurity” than claiming you could perform auto-fellatio, but won’t, because “You’d still have a dick in your mouth”? It’s a kind of platonic ideal of Rogan-ness—and not just because it’d presumably shut him up for a couple of minutes.