Michael Bolton, Macy Gray, Jewel, Sisqó to champion their states in that U.S. Eurovision show

Kelly Clarkson and Snoop Dogg will host American Song Contest later this month

Michael Bolton, Macy Gray, Jewel, Sisqó to champion their states in that U.S. Eurovision show
From left to right: Michael Bolton (Allen Berezovsky/Getty Images), Macy Gray (Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images for God’s Love We Deliver), Jewel (Duane Prokop/Getty Images for The Wellness Experience by Kroger), Sisqó (Phillip Faraone/Getty Images)

What does it say, fundamentally, about a state, when the most prominent musical star it can procure for itself is Sisqó? (If we had to guess, it’s a cultural and spiritual fixation with the humble thong tha-thong-thong thong.)

And yet, that’s the state of affairs we’re set to embark upon fairly soon, as Deadline reports that the American Song Contest—an officially licensed, States-based version of the famed, sometimes mocked, Eurovision competition—has lined up a slate of performers for all 50 states, plus Washington D.C. and five U.S. territories. NBC released the names of all of the competitors in the upcoming battle via an interactive map earlier this week, and it’s an eclectic mix, made up of amateurs, up-and-comers, and a few career musicians whose careers apparently have enough free time for an event like this.

That, of course, includes Sisqó, who’ll be representing his native Maryland—horniest of states!—in the competition. Other established musicians in the contest include Michael Bolton (Connecticut), Jewel (Alaska), and Macy Gray, who’ll be pulling for all the Buckeyes from the great state of Ohio.

It’s not entirely clear how any of these participants were picked—California and New York are being represented by the group Sweet Taboo and performer ENISA, respectively, for instance, which (not to be mean) are fairly minor acts if we’re looking at the Big List Of Every Working Performer From New York Or California. (One thing to note, though, is that Atlantic Records is deeply involved with, and releasing music from, this project, so the presence of Atlantic artists like Gray, Jewel, and ENISA isn’t totally difficult to parse out.) The submission process apparently involved submitting an original, non-commercially-released song, along with a list of states that participants had an “authentic, deep connection” to.

American Song Contest will begin airing on March 21, with winners determined by some as-yet-unelucidated process involving a mixture of fan voting and a jury of “industry professionals.” The absolute, unequivocal best song in America will then be crowned some time in May.

 
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