In the new trailer for Selena Gomez: My Mind And Me, a child star grapples with mortality

Selena Gomez is no stranger to the warm lick of the limelight: she had her first major television role on Barney & Friends when she was just 10. But in her new Apple TV+ documentary Selena Gomez: My Mind And Me, the actor/singer/entrepreneur steps into a different, more personally illuminating spotlight. The first trailer for the film (which dropped today) finds Gomez contemplating her personal achievements, her health struggles, and her two decades as a public figure.

The trailer begins with a strong sentiment from Gomez: “I’m grateful to be alive.” Although most could raise a glass to the same words, Gomez’s statement holds extra weight given her struggle with lupus, an autoimmune disorder she was first diagnosed with in 2015. Gomez has also been candid about struggling with depression and anxiety, an openness she says she hopes resonates with listeners.

“Clearly, I’m still here to use whatever I have to help someone else,” she explains in voiceover.

In one sweet moment, Gomez visits an old friend and surprises her young daughter, who screams and runs over to the actor the second she realizes who she’s talking to. “Yes she’s real,” Gomez’s friend chuckles as her daughter basks in a fangirl moment. “Mommy went to school with her.”

The trailer also includes a first glimpse at a new track Gomez wrote for My Mind & Me, a strings-heavy ballad that finds Gomez singing: “If somebody sees me like this then they won’t feel alone.”

“My whole life since I was a kid I’ve been working,” Gomez shares. “I don’t want to be super famous, but I do know that if I’m here I have to do that for good.”

Selena Gomez: My Mind And Me will be available for streaming on Apple TV+ beginning November 4.